Caveat: 47) 세상의 물을 더럽히며 살아 온 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity which comes alive to dirty the world’s water.”

This is #47 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


45. 내가 살고있는 지구를 생각하지 않은 것을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of not thinking about the world in which I live.”
46. 세상의 공기를 더럽히며 살아 온 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity which comes alive to dirty the world’s air.”
47. 세상의 물을 더럽히며 살아 온 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this forty-seventh affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity which comes alive to dirty the world’s water.”

Simple substitution: air -> water. As when I was living in Mexico, in Korea, I trust the water more than the air, generally speaking. The day was beautiful and sunny today, though.

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Caveat: 얄러뷰

Two of my first-grade students, Min-gyeong and Dan-bi, wrote “I love you 얄러뷰” in a big heart in their good-bye message.
I was trying to figure out “얄러뷰” – but it’s not Korean. I think “yal-leo-byu” is a transliteration of “I love you” – sound it out!
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I got portraits of the fourth-graders today. Here they are.
4-1:
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4-2:
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4-3:
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The 4-2 class did some role-plays today, and I took a few pictures.
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I am going to miss Ye-won especially (on the left, below).  The other day, she said to me:  “I will hate the new teacher, already, because you are the best teacher.”  That’s way too good for my ego.  Plus, her English is pretty good, eh?
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Here I am goofing around with some fifth- and sixth-graders during recess today.  Note that the girls provided me with a disguise – can you tell it’s me?
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Here are some memento photos of the cafeteria during lunch time.
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My lunch tray, and my co-teacher Ms Lee across from me.
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Here are some boys hamming for the camera.
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Finally, here are some kids brushing their teeth at the communal teeth-brushing place:
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I am going to miss this school so much. Should I have stayed?  Maybe.
I will not miss the feeling of isolation, which was exacerbated by a school administrative office that is xenophobic and stunningly incompetent, and which conducted itself without exception with utter disregard for my status as a fellow human being, despite my substantial dependence upon them for my outside-of-work day-to-day living.
I think that one way to put it is that I will miss the weekday 9am~5pm part of this experience intensely, but I will not miss the weekday 5pm~9am part of it not at all. And that, when you get right down to it, is not a good proportion for a sustainable lifestyle.
I have learned hugely, this past year – about myself, about teaching, about children and about what’s important in the world. I hope I can keep these lessons alive in my heart and carry them back to Ilsan and my next job.

Caveat: Lotus Flower, Paper Boat

pictureNo, I mean nothing Buddhist.

I’m packing. I’m listening to Minnesota Public Radio’s “The Current” (dumb name, great programming). Radiohead’s “Lotus Flower” comes on. Nice track.

So. Where did I get all this crap? Wait… don’t answer that. I’m packing.

I went to Gwangju for a few hours, today. It was stupid – I needed to get some cash, and my bank has no local branch in Yeonggwang County. So I used it as an excuse to say “goodbye” to the City of Light, and procrastinate on some packing.

Inside the Gwangju subway, they post poetry. At the 송정공원 station, I saw this poem (above, right).

I had brief feeling of linguistic victory, as I managed to parse the first two lines of the poem without having to resort to a dictionary. The poem’s title is “Paper Boat.”  I think that’s what it’s about. The narrator launches a paper boat into a stream from a bridge.  Etc.

The Gwangju subway is desolate and not very useful. It only has one line. Mostly old people ride it. Here is the context of the poem I saw on the wall – note – there’s no one in the subway on a Sunday morning.

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When I was leaving my home (well, my apartment, and only for two more days!) earlier, I walked past the school’s playground, and took a picture of some springy trees.

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What I’m listening to right now.

Radiohead, “Lotus Flower.”

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Caveat: 46) 세상의 공기를 더럽히며 살아 온 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity which comes alive to dirty the world’s air.”

This is #46 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


44. 삼생의 모든 인연들을 위해 지극한 마음으로 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance with a sincere heart, taking care of all ties to past lives.”
45. 내가 살고있는 지구를 생각하지 않은 것을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of not thinking about the world in which I live.”
46. 세상의 공기를 더럽히며 살아 온 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this forty-sixth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity which comes alive to dirty the world’s air.”

This is more of that “purity narrative,” of course, which is perhaps one of the aspects of Buddhist thinking that I find least appealing.  The metaphorical relation between concepts of cleanness and moral or virtuous behavior is, of course, almost universal in ethical systems, but I think that overthinking these kinds of purity-obsessed metaphors is insiduous vis-a-vis a social system’s ability to promote tolerance of otherness and difference. I have a lot of ideas on the topic, but I’ve never done very well at setting them down in writing – most notably, during my 10 day Vipassana retreat in December, 2009, I tried to develop this thinking and failed miserably.

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Caveat: 45) 내가 살고있는 지구를 생각하지 않은 것을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of not thinking about the world in which I live.”

This is #45 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


43. 내 생각만 옳다는 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe through only my thoughts.”
44. 삼생의 모든 인연들을 위해 지극한 마음으로 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance with a sincere heart, taking care of all ties to past lives.”
45. 내가 살고있는 지구를 생각하지 않은 것을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this forty-fifth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of not thinking about the world in which I live.”

Wow. I actually had no problem understanding this. I didn’t look any words up – I just wrote the translation, confidently. I’m either making some small progress, or else I got lucky and got an “easy” one. Or may this is one area where I might, in fact, have an opposite problem – I spend far too much time thinking about the world in which I live. It’s like a giant academic puzzle.

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Caveat: 44) 삼생의 모든 인연들을 위해 지극한 마음으로 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance with a sincere heart, taking care of all ties to past lives.”

This is #44 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


42. 내 몸으로받은 느낌만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by feeling only [the sensations] of my body.”
43. 내 생각만 옳다는 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe through only my thoughts.”
44. 삼생의 모든 인연들을 위해 지극한 마음으로 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this forty-fourth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance with a sincere heart, taking care of all ties to past lives.”

I don’t believe in past lives. Perhaps I could view this as repenting my ties to history, a la a sort of Foucauldian geneology of ideologies.

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Caveat: Testimonial

I have a 2nd grade student, Jeong-seok, who wrote an essay.  His little essay was posted on the school's web forum, and my co-worker sent me a copy.  It's flattering, and my heart is touched.  I feel proud to be mentioned in a 2nd grader's essay in such a positive way.

영어수업을 할 때 게임을 했다. 동그라미모양종이에 자기가 하고 싶은 동전 숫자를 적으면 그걸 원어민 선생님인 제럴드선생님에게 드리고 진짜동전처럼 생긴 동전을 한국 선생님께 드리면 스티커를 받는다.  10개를 넘게 받은 친구들도 있었는데 나는 5개를 받았다.  나는 10개 보다 많이 받은 친구가 너~무~부러웠다 나는 스티커를 안내장 넣는 파일에 붙였다.   영어가 재미있게 되고 있으니 눈에 빨리 빨리 들어 오는 것  같기도 하였다.   방과후영어도 정말 재미있게 했다.

I guess that makes a good day.

[Comment added later:  Some have requested a translation.  My Korean isn't so good as to offer a translation.  Google's translate-o-matic makes gobbledy-gook of it, which is about what I would do.  I just kind of scan it and get the gist of it, knowing that it's positive.  Here's the result of plugging into google (with a few minor but obvious glaring corrections):  "When teaching English game. A circle on the paper and he'll put the number of coins you want it wiht a native speaker teacher, Jereot teacher, if it looks like a real coin coin Korea figure, the teacher gives a sticker. I have friends who were over 10 coins received five. I received more than 10, friends envied ~ Foreign ~ the invitation I put stickers attached to the file. English is fun may just be coming in soon, so eyes were fast. School English and was really fun."]

Caveat: 43) 내 생각만 옳다는 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe through only my thoughts.”

This is #43 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


41. 내 입으로 맛 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only trying tastes with my mouth.”
42. 내 몸으로받은 느낌만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by feeling only [the sensations] of my body.”
43. 내 생각만 옳다는 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this forty-third affirmation as:  “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe through only my thoughts.”

Most of my stupidity arises in this way – I think of stupid things. I’m much more likely to give credence to my own stupid ideas than to those of others.

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Caveat: 42) 내 몸으로받은 느낌만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by feeling only [the sensations] of my body.”

This is #42 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


40. 내 코로 맡은 냄새만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only following the smells my nose finds.”
41. 내 입으로 맛 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only trying tastes with my mouth.”
42. 내 몸으로받은 느낌만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this forty-second affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by feeling only [the sensations] of my body.”

Is this related to the fact that today (Wednesday) is staff volleyball day? I definitely feel stupid, through the sensations of my body, when I try to play volleyball.

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Caveat: 情

It was several years ago, now, that my Korean friend Curt told me: “You have no jeong.” Many Koreans have an exceptionalist view of this emotion that is described by the word jeong [정 (情)] – they will explain that it is a uniquely Korean emotion, or that Koreans uniquely tend toward it in contrast to members of other cultures.

The dictionary tells us that jeong means something like:  love, affection, attachment, sentiment, strong feeling, concern, matter-of-the-heart.

I found a fascinating academic write up on the word online, which I unfortunately cannot recommend to non-linguists because of its utterly obtuse non-standard romanization of Korean, which renders 정 as [ceng] – I believe this is called the “Yale” romanization, and while as a linguist I understand the motivations behind it, I dislike it intensely because it is very remote from being accessible to non-specialists, leading to inevitable mutilations of pronunciation.

Here is a more typical exceptionalist presentation of the concept from a “study English” website (i.e. it’s an essay talking about jeong as unique to Korean culture, written in English to provide a chance to study aspects of English – this kind of thing is everywhere in Korean English educaction at all levels).

At the time that Curt made his assertion, I was skeptical, on two counts. I discounted the exceptionalist view that there could exist a basic “emotion” that was unique to one culture, and I also rejected the idea that I lacked it.  I suppose, in part, my feelings were hurt.  And when it comes to notions of language and culture, I tend toward universalism – I assume that basic human emotions, for example, are the same for all humans.

So I attributed his statement regarding my lack of jeong as a simple issue of there being a language barrier – surely a truly bilingual person could identify the proper English equivalent, both in linguistic and cultural terms.

But now, several years later, I have begun to genuinely harbor reservations about my prior rejection. I find the workings of Korean jeong mysterious and impenetrable.  It seems to be a hybrid of irrational loyalty and intense platonic love, with a strong seasoning of smarmy sentimentality. And I’ve come to accept that, as a Westerner, I probably “lack” it – in that I have no reductive mental category that encompasses these sorts feelings in simple conjuct.

When Mr Choi throws his arm around me at the staff volleyball game, that’s jeong. And when the staff take up a collection of cash to help my fellow teacher pay his outrageous electricity bill, that’s somehow also jeong.  When a teacher admonishes a student to study harder, that might be jeong, too.

I keep trying to figure it out.
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Caveat: 41) 내 입으로 맛 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only trying tastes with my mouth.”

This is #41 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


39. 내 귀로들은 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by my own ears to be right.”
40. 내 코로 맡은 냄새만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only following the smells my nose finds.”
41. 내 입으로 맛 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this forty-first affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only trying tastes with my mouth.”

Ok. So I’m a wannabe foodie. But my laziness mostly trumps my fooditude. So I’ll repent that instead?

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Caveat: 40) 내 코로 맡은 냄새만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only following the smells my nose finds.”

This is #40 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


38. 내 눈으로 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe in my own eyes to be right.”
39. 내 귀로들은 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by my own ears to be right.”
40. 내 코로 맡은 냄새만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this fortieth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by only following the smells my nose finds.”

… but… but… those homemade tortillas I made yesterday with my illegally imported, well-traveled Mexican corn masa (manufactured in Texas, bought in an imported food shop in Queensland, smuggled into South Korea) smelled so delicious!

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I made a cheese quesadilla. The Korean processed sliced cheese wasn’t very good – a kind of petrochemically-tinged decadence – but the corn-tasting tortillas were excellent.

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Caveat: 39) 내 귀로들은 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by my own ears to be right.”

This is #39 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


37. 집착하는 마음과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all actions and words and heart that cling.”
38. 내 눈으로 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe in my own eyes to be right.”
39. 내 귀로들은 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-ninth affirmation as:  “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe by my own ears to be right.”

Monkey see.  Monkey hear.

Hi monkey.

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Caveat: 38) 내 눈으로 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe in my own eyes to be right.”

This is #38 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


36. 어리석은 행동으로 악연이 될 수있는 인연에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any ties that can become an evil destiny through stupid talk.”
37. 집착하는 마음과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all actions and words and heart that cling.”
38. 내 눈으로 본 것만 옳다고 생각한 어리석음을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-eighth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all the stupidity that I believe in my own eyes to be right.”

Wow. And how do I identify my own stupidity if I believe it is right? I guess that’s why it’s about repentance, not prevention.

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Caveat: 37) 집착하는 마음과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all actions and words and heart that cling.”

This is #37 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


35. 어리석은 말로 상대방이 잘못되는 악연을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of any ties to the mistakes made by others because of their foolish talk.”
36. 어리석은 행동으로 악연이 될 수있는 인연에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any ties that can become an evil destiny through stupid talk.”
37. 집착하는 마음과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-seventh affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all actions and words and heart that cling.”

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Caveat: 36) 어리석은 행동으로 악연이 될 수있는 인연에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of any ties that can become an evil destiny through stupid talk.”

This is #36 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


34. 악연의 씨가되는 어리석은 생각을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any stupid thoughts [that are] the seeds of evil.”
35. 어리석은 말로 상대방이 잘못되는 악연을 참회하며 절합니다.
       “I bow in repentance of any ties to the mistakes made by others because of their foolish talk.”
36. 어리석은 행동으로 악연이 될 수있는 인연에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-sixth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of any ties that can become an evil destiny through stupid talk.”

I’m not sure I translated that right. I feel like I’m missing something, on this one – the syntax isn’t the same pattern as recent previous ones. How do ties become an evil destiny?  Isn’t this a repetition of a previous one through different syntax? I’m looking for some subtle difference in meaning.  Anyway. I’m not feeling very hardcore about trying to figure it out, at the moment.

I’ve been feeling a little discouraged, lately, about the giant “learn Korean” project. Motivation will return.

Yesterday, I met friends and ate too much. I had vietnamese for lunch in Ilsan and italian for dinner in Hongdae. I got a ride back to Suwon with my friend Mr Choi and his colleague – traffic was so bad, I would have been better off by twice-as-fast using my usual subway-and-bus combo. I always knew having a car in Seoul was a bad idea – that just confirms it. But it was good to spend some time with him.

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Caveat: 35) 어리석은 말로 상대방이 잘못되는 악연을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of any ties to the mistakes made by others because of their foolish talk.”

This is #35 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


33. 오직 나만을 생각하는 것을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of thinking only of myself.”
34. 악연의 씨가되는 어리석은 생각을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any stupid thoughts [that are] the seeds of evil.”
35. 어리석은 말로 상대방이 잘못되는 악연을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-fifth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of any ties to the mistakes made by others because of their foolish talk.”

This is exceptionally pertinent to my principal’s Friday night pontifications. So I will try not to attach to his words.

In Suwon I stay at my Korean friend’s guesthouse, which is near the Hwaseong palace. Here is a dark and fuzzy picture of the palace I took last night walking around.

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Caveat: Day Two – Redemption Amid Snow and Orange Groves

[NOTE: This is the second part of a two-part blog post. The first part is here.]

I awoke at 6, only a little later than my usual time, despite the poor night’s sleep. I escaped the snore-o-mania and explored the hotel a little bit. It’s what Koreans call “condominium” but that’s not what it is by an American English definition – it’s a hotel for large groups, where you cram 6 or 8 people into each room that is a little bit like a small apartment.

One of my roommates seemed to have set up camp in the bathroom, so I went out to the lobby in search of a public restroom. Koreans have a habit of posting small inspirational sayings along the walls and stall doors of public restrooms. I enjoyed the one I found there so much, I took its picture. Maybe that’s because I understood it.

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"생각"을 조심하라, 그곳이 너의 "말"이 뒨다
"말"을 조심하라, 그곳이 너의 "행동"이 뒨다
"행동"을 조심하라, 그곳이 너의 "습관"이 뒨다
"습관"을 조심하라, 그곳이 너의 "인격"이 뒨다
"인격"을 조심하라, 그곳이 너의 "운명"이 되리라

[control your “thoughts,” as they become your “words” / control your “words,” as they become your “actions” / control your “actions,” as they become your “habits” / control your “habits,” as they become your “character” / control your “character” as that is your “destiny”]

I talked to Ms Ryu in the lobby for a while about the my feelings about last night. She was her usual upbeat self, trying to put a positive spin on things, but she seemed to understand.

The hotel is on the northwest coast of the oval-shaped island. I walked around and took some pictures. The day was windy and overcast.

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At 8:30 AM we all piled onto a bus and went to get breakfast. We had the famous “hangover soup” that includes ox-blood and lots of red (spicy) pepper and vegetables.

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I admired the Jeju City-scape. Well. Not really. Urban Jeju is exactly as unattractive as I’d always imagined it to be (as well as some very vague memories from a visit to the island while doing some weird training exercise in the US Army when I was here in 1991, although it’s much more developed now). Still, all the palms and citrus and stone walls made of dark volcanic rock reminded me of rural central Mexico. Except for the patches of snow on the ground.

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Then we drove to Hallasan. Halla mountain is the extinct volcano that makes up the center of Jeju Island, and is, incidentally, the highest mountain in South Korea, despite its eccentric location. It was covered in snow – between half a meter and more than a meter deep, packed down, in most places. Here and there on the trail there were places where the pack was weak and your foot would sink down 20 or 40 cm. But mostly, it was hiking on top of snow. Everyone was using something called, in Korean, “a-i-jen” which they allege is English, but I have no idea what it might actually be. They’re strap-on rubber and metal cleats for the bottoms of one’s hiking boots.

Not all the teachers went. The group that did – about 12 of us – was a core group of teachers whose company I enjoy. It was a redemptive situation, hiking outdoors with people I like being with. I went from hating the trip to loving it. Which is why I went, right? Because things can change, like that.

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I saw a child who seemed to be hiking alone. I love how independent Korean children are – it seems so at odds with the conformity in their culture, but I think on deeper reflection, it’s not. It all works together, somehow.

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At the top of the mountain, we had kimbap and ramyeon for lunch, and the 4-1 teacher had packed a bottle of whiskey. She shared half-shots around, in a paper cup. We also saw many crows (or are they ravens?).

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Stupid 138

Coming down, we saw many fine views.

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We also did some “bobsledding” on our butts. I wish I had pictures of that. It was awesomely fun, careening down the trails with a bunch of elementary school teachers acting just like elementary school children. It reminded me how much I have actually enjoyed skiing, the times I’ve gotten into that. Hmm. Well, maybe again sometime. Anyway, I recommend “buttsledding” most highly.

Finally, at 3:30, we met up with the bus and the rest of the group again.  We drove down to the south side of the island, past many orange groves.

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We stopped and had some spicy fish for dinner, and then arrived at the ferry terminal at 6:00, for the return trip to the mainland. Ms Ryu and Mr Choi insisted on one last photo op.

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The drive back to Hongnong was agonizingly slow, and I was sore (from the 10 km hike on slippery snow the whole way) and damp (from the buttsledding). We stopped 3 places in Gwangju City, and also in Yeonggwang, dropping people off. I finally got home at 12:20 AM. I was tired.

I’m glad we had a second day, and that we got to hang out on the mountain with no principals. So to speak.

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Caveat: 34) 악연의 씨가되는 어리석은 생각을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of any stupid thoughts [that are] the seeds of evil.”

This is #34 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


32. 한갓 취미나 즐거움으로 다른 생명을 희생시키는 일을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any sacrifice of the lives of others [in pursuit] of mere pasttime or pleasure.”
33. 오직 나만을 생각하는 것을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of thinking only of myself.”
34. 악연의 씨가되는 어리석은 생각을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-fourth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of any stupid thoughts [that are] the seeds of evil.”

Stupid thoughts. Huh-huh.

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Caveat: 33) 오직 나만을 생각하는 것을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of thinking only of myself.”

This is #33 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


31. 남의 것을 훔치는 생각과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any thought or action of stealing another’s things.”
32. 한갓 취미나 즐거움으로 다른 생명을 희생시키는 일을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any sacrifice of the lives of others [in pursuit] of mere pasttime or pleasure.”
33. 오직 나만을 생각하는 것을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-third affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of thinking only of myself.”

I’ve actually felt like this whole vacation trip I’ve taken was kind of an exercise in self-absorbsion. I went to visit my mother, but I don’t know that I was particularly good at efforts at selflessness in my ongoing interactions with her. And the trip to New Zealand, while interesting, has left me feeling like it was self-indulgent without in any way contributing to my growth as a person.

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Caveat: 32) 한갓 취미나 즐거움으로 다른 생명을 희생시키는 일을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of any sacrifice of the lives of others [in pursuit] of mere pasttime or pleasure.”

This is #32 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


30. 거짓말과 갖가지 위선을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all kinds of hypocrisy and lies.”
31. 남의 것을 훔치는 생각과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of any thought or action of stealing another’s things.”
32. 한갓 취미나 즐거움으로 다른 생명을 희생시키는 일을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-second affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of any sacrifice of the lives of others [in pursuit] of mere pasttime or pleasure.”

Yeah. Bad idea.

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Caveat: 31) 남의 것을 훔치는 생각과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of any thought or action of stealing another’s things.”

This is #31 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


29. 비겁한 생각과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of cowardly thoughts, words and actions.”
30. 거짓말과 갖가지 위선을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of all kinds of hypocrisy and lies.”
31. 남의 것을 훔치는 생각과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirty-first affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of any thought or action of stealing another’s things.”

Stealing. I once stole a book. From a library. Should I confess this, online, in front of the world?

It wasn’t an act of avarice – I don’t have much problem with avarice.  It was an act of pique – I was angry at the library because they had charged me a fine for stealing (or “losing”) a book that I had most definitely returned. It was an act of revenge, I suppose. So I’ll bow in repentance of thoughts and actions of vengeance and pique.

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Caveat: Phenomimes and Psychomimes

All languages have onomatopoeia:  words like “woof woof” (a dog barking), or “whirr” (a spinning thing or a dragonfly), etc.  But Korean (and apparently Japanese, too) possesses an abundant class of words known as phenomimes and psychomimes.  These are words that use “sound symbolism” (q.v. in wikipedia) to represent concepts that aren’t, per se, auditory, but in a symbolic way. Most of the Korean ones include a great deal of reduplication and vowel harmony – in fact, it could be argued that these are actually some fossilized productive reduplicative semantic feature of proto-Korean, and not really “phenomimes” or “psychomimes” at all – it’s all in the definition of those concepts, I guess. Most of them are adverbial, in syntactic terms.
I love these things.  They’re one of the reasons the Korean language is magical, for me.
Some examples, from my “bible” (Korean Grammar for International Learners, by Ihm Ho Bin et al.):
반짝반짝 [ban-jjak-ban-jjak] sparklingly
슬슬 [seul-seul] gently
주렁주렁 [ju-reong-ju-reong] richly, with fullness
흔들흔들 [heun-deul-heun-deul] shakily
옹기종기 [ong-gi-jong-gi] closely together
방긋방긋 [bang-geut-bang-geut] broadly [as in a smile]
드르르 [deu-reu-reu] excellently, smoothly
부둑부둑 [bu-dok-bu-dok] damp-dry, a bit damp mostly dry
[Update: I have blogged about this topic again with many more examples, 2012-06-04 and 2012-10-19. I have also modified this original post somewhat since it’s one of the number one draws of my blog from the broader internet, when people google “phenomimes” and “psychomimes” with “korean”, and I have been crosslinked, too.]
[Update 2 (2015-10-08): I decided to create a consolidated list of examples, which I can update periodically.]

Caveat: 30) 거짓말과 갖가지 위선을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of all kinds of hypocrisy and lies.”

This is #30 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


28. 무시 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
         “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to ignorance .”
29. 비겁한 생각과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of cowardly thoughts, words and actions.”
30. 거짓말과 갖가지 위선을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this thirtieth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of all kinds of hypocrisy and lies.”

I have a big issue with hypocrisy. So much so, that in fact I have, over the years, tried to get better at ignoring it, for the world is full of hypocrisy. Being guilty of various kinds of hypocrisy myself at one moment or another, I think that disliking or repenting of hypocrisy might be a sort of hypocrisy, too. Complicated, the ways of guilt. Is that what this is about?

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Caveat: 29) 비겁한 생각과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of cowardly thoughts, words and actions.”

This is #29 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


27. 비방 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to slanders done.”
28. 무시 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
         “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to ignorance .”
29. 비겁한 생각과 말과 행동을 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-ninth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of cowardly thoughts, words and actions.”

I’m not sure, regarding this problem of cowardice: I assume it means thoughts, words and actions that derive from fear. What is fear? I’m not as fearful as I once was. But in other ways, I’m still fearful: my tendency to avoid difficult social situations, especially, is still quite strong.

Lately, I been feeling very “bonded” to the landscape. The weather has been exactly like a Minnesota winter – a lot of snow and ice on the ground and roads, packed down and consolidated by periodic daily thaws and traffic and dirt, cold nights: I think yesterday morning was at least -10 C, everything feels “crisp” and it’s cold enough that the ice isn’t very slippery anymore. I walk to the bus station, I ride the bus, I look around… Korea seems extraordinarily beautiful, to me.

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Caveat: 28) 무시 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to ignorance.”

This is #28 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


26. 이간질로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to the divisions sown between people.”
27. 비방 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to slanders done.”
28. 무시 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-eighth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to ignorance.”

Ignorance, shmignorance. Sounds like you got an epistemological problem, buddy. Typical. Happy New Year. Not. My. Favorite. Holiday.

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Caveat: 27) 비방 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to slanders done.”

This is #27 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


25. 원망하는 마음으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to a resentful heart.”
26. 이간질로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to the divisions sown between people.”
27. 비방 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-seventh affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to slanders done.”

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Caveat: 26) 이간질로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to the divisions sown between people.”

This is #26 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).


24. 인색 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to miserliness.”
25. 원망하는 마음으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to a resentful heart.”
26. 이간질로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-sixth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to the divisions sown between people.”

“이간질” seems hard to translate in this affirmation. The dictionaries say everything from “division” to “alienation” to “mischief” to “the act of playing one side against the other.”  None of these really work in the above phrase. So, I’ve settled on “the divisions sown between people.”

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Caveat: 25) 원망하는 마음으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to a resentful heart.”

This is #25 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).

23. 분노 심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
         “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to succumbing to rage.”

24. 인색 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to miserliness.”

25. 원망하는 마음으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-fifth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to a resentful heart.”

This affirmation sounds like a country western song lyric. A little bit.

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Caveat: 24) 인색 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to miserliness.”

This is #24 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).

22. 시기심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to jealousy.”

23. 분노 심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
         “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to succumbing to rage.”

24. 인색 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-fourth affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to miserliness.”

It can be difficult to let go of physical possessions and money.

Today is the first day of the winter term – I will be teaching optional “English Camp” classes for the kids. Many of the kids and most of the teachers are on vacation.

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Caveat: The Amazing Triumph In Which Bad News Came Embedded

I'm writing this as I ride the bus to work. Sometimes I do writing on the bus – it's a good use of the commute time. I save a file, and move it to my online cache or post it later. 

After my previous post, which was depressing in tone, I was meditating. Well… I was attempting to meditate – I don't really think that what I do counts as "real" meditation, although it might count, under some zen-like definitions. Mostly, I watch my monkeymind as it monkeyminds around, with a certain effort at detachedness. I was thinking, of course, about the upcoming Move. What worries me, most, about it? Well, I know which building I'm moving to – it's being built by the school. The school will be my new landlord. This is terrifying, because the school has a notably horrible track-record in managing other aspects of its physical plant. Therefore I expect, with 100% certainty, substantial problems in at least one of the following areas: utilities and internet (90% chance); appliances and things falling apart – despite (or because of) it being a new building – (60%); lack of essential furnishings (40%); plumbing problems (99%). Et cetera.

As I was thinking, however, I tried really hard to find and enumerate the positives. And there are quite a few, actually: 1) the commute will be reduced from 50 minutes each way to less than 5 minutes each way; 2) I will not miss living in Yeonggwang, which is still, by far, the ugliest town I have known in Korea – a country not noted for its attractive efforts at urbanization; 3) the chances that the new apartment is smaller than my current one are probably about nil; 4) I will save money on at least the commuting aspect – I'll be paying no more of the 3400 KRW daily in bus fares, which will add up over my last several months; 5) hopefully money can also be saved vis-a-vis the apartment billing too – my current building nickel-and-dimes me on mysterious building maintenance fees quite a bit – but with the school being the landlord, I might have more opportunity to push back on that kind of thing. 

But there was a real, amazing victory right in front of me, too. It was something altogether different. Yesterday morning, I went to bow to my principal in the morning, as I generally try to do. And after bowing, he approached me and spoke to me about this apartment matter – in Korean. That's how I got the confirmation of the rumor. Yes, I received the news in the Korean Language. Entirely. I even caught some of subtleties of the communication: "did I happen to know that…?" "I hope you'll be OK with…." And this is, upon reflection, a suprising accomplishment. I was receiving work-related news from my principal in Korean and I wasn't even really thinking about the fact that it was in Korean. I didn't understand everything – I never do: impressionistically, it's kind of "blah blah new apartment blah blah in february blah blah I hope that's OK blah blah." But I had no sense that there was some important ambiguity in the communication that I was missing. It was simply what he was telling me. And that was a linguistic triumph.

Caveat: 23) 분노 심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to succumbing to rage.”

This is #23 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).

21. 탐욕으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to avarice.”

22. 시기심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to jealousy.”

23. 분노 심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-third affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to succumbing to rage.”

Coming across this one has caused me to doubt my certainty about my translation above for #18, where I translated “성냄” as “anger.”  But this word, “분노” also seems to mean anger. They’re different types of anger, I’m guessing. “성냄” is offense, or a flaring up of annoyance. Perhaps it might be described as controlled anger.

I get the impression “분노” is more the uncontrolled sort. So I decided to go with the word rage. I’m wondering if the defective helping verb “시다” (in gerund form “심” above) isn’t also altering the meaning somewhat (note that I use “defective” as reference to an established grammatical abstraction, meaning a verb that is not fully conjugable – it’s not a judgment on the quality of the verb). I don’t really even understand how this verb works – it seems to mean something like “allow” or “let.” So it’s “rage being allowed.” Hmm, like “succumbing to rage.”

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Caveat: 22) 시기심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다

“I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to jealousy.”

This is #22 out of a series of 108 daily Buddhist affirmations that I am attempting to translate with my hands tied behind my back (well not really that, but I’m deliberately not seeking out translations on the internet, using only dictionary and grammar).

20. 교만 함으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to arrogance.”

21. 탐욕으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.
        “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to avarice.”

22. 시기심으로 인해 악연이 된 인연들에게 참회하며 절합니다.

I would read this twenty-second affirmation as: “I bow in repentance of the ties that become like an evil destiny due to jealousy.”

These recent affirmations have not been so difficult to translate, since only the initial word (which ends up the last word in the translation) has varied. Anger, harsh words, avarice, jealousy. Your standard enumeration of bad things, across most religious traditions.

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