Caveat: the internet let me down

I had one of my "low tech" Sundays, I guess. I was tired of looking at the internet and tried to avoid it today.

What I'm listening to right now.

This morning, anyway, when I started to prepare this blog-post, the internet let me down. I was listening to this song, and was going to post it. But the song is completely missing from the normal places where such things can be found – e.g. youtube, vimeo. Not even the pirate-riddled Chinese site I've used a few times. So. No online track available. I guess they want you to buy it. How antiquated.

Epsilon Minus, "Lost."

Lyrics.

My sadness seeks out comfort
Where are you now
I just had to express these feelings
My regret overwhelms me
I feel you now
I just had to show you what remains

You said that I would never change
Just a frozen thought in your mind
I'm destined to remain
You embody everything I am
And I thought I would tell you all this
As I watch you slip away
And the hope built up inside
Told me this would be the time
I would cry no more goodbyes
You gave the world to me

My loneliness astounds me
I've lost you now
I have no one to blame for these things

You fought to keep them all away
But desire overcomes me
And that's something new to me
I've known longing
I've lost something

And the hope built up inside
Lied to me a thousand times
I've cried one more goodbye
The world I had destroyed
And these feelings I won't hide
When the tears slowly subside
I've lost everything today
When you took the world from me

 

[daily log: walking, not much]

Caveat: Theacher BaBo I’m Claber ok!

Last Tuesday, during my new Basic반 cohort (with 1st and 2nd grade elementary, beginning-level students), a student named Gloria came to the class. The thing is, Gloria does not belong in that cohort – she's pretty smart and anyway she is much farther ahead in English, currently being part of Grace's CS cohort. But for some scheduling reason, Gloria is stuck attending on Tuesdays, when Grace's CS class doesn't meet, so she got slotted into the Basic class, as being the only age-appropriate alternative. 

I think she's a little bit resentful of this, but she participated well with the other kids, and I felt like she wasn't upset about it. It is an easy class, at the least, for her. Then, at the end of the class, she kind of surreptitiously handed me this note, below. Just the fact that she has the level of ability to compose such a note puts her at a much higher level than the other students in the Basic class.

Glorias_note

To transcribe, it says:

Hi ~ Teacher   It's Gloria
Theacher BaBo. Thank Thank you.
o  I'm Claber. ok! 
       - Gloria –

The word "babo" is Korean. It means something like "dummy" or "stupidhead." The word "claber" is a misspelling of "clever."

It was cute, anyway. I like the black cloud over my head, in the portrait. Did I really say that?

[daily log: walking, 7km]

Caveat: happy to just fall down

The Korean TV news is full of bits on the North Koreans' Party Congress, the first in 36 years. KJU is consolidating his power, repossessing the military, and showing savvier leadership than had been expected, it appears. Not that that's a good thing. 

 Perhaps relatedly, what I'm listening to right now.

Communist Daughter, "Not the Kid."

Lyrics.

When we were younger
we had nothing to do
so we'd close our eyes
and spin around in circles
happy to hit the ground
or happy to just fall down

When we were younger
we'd go down to the park
we'd catch all the fireflies
we'd put 'em in jars
we never knew that they'd die
we never really thought that far

I'm not the kid you knew
im not the kid you remember

When we were younger
we were scared of the dark
so we closed our eyes
we pulled the sheets over our heads
we didn't want to see what's there
like the shadows under the bed

And now that I'm older
I look back on those days
I wish I had them back
cuz the shadows are gone
or at least they're not that strong
as the shadows in my head

I'm not the kid you knew
I'm not the kid you remember

I'm not the kid you knew
I'm not the kid you remember

In 1985
well there was a picture taken with my name on it
climbin' an apple tree with blue shoes
You'd think it was me
I could swear it was you

I'm not the kid you knew
i'm not the kid you remember

I'm not the kid you knew
i'm not the kid you remember

I'm not the kid you knew
i'm not the kid you remember

I'm not the kid you knew
i'm not the kid you remember

Notes for Korean (finding meaning)

  • 병진 = advancing side-by-side – this is the label for the new, not-military-first policy initiative by NK's KJU

[daily log: walking, 1km]

 

Caveat: Abandon all reason

Today is a holiday, in South Korea. I'm celebrating by procrastinating on everything important. In fact, I have invented a new religion: procrastinatarianism.

Meanwhile, I'll share this, which made me laugh inappropriately when I ran across it at work during a brief free moment, on a website I frequent called SpeculativeGrammarian, and which I was utterly unable to explain to my coworkers. 

Self-ref

What I'm listening to right now.

Radiohead, "Burn The Witch." This is their new song. As usual, one of my favorite bands. Creepy video, too. 

Lyrics.

[Verse 1]
Stay in the shadows
Cheer at the gallows
This is a round up

[Pre-Chorus 1]
This is a low flying panic attack
Sing a song on the jukebox that goes

[Chorus]
Burn the witch
Burn the witch
We know where you live

[Verse 2]
Red crosses on wooden doors
And if you float you burn
Loose talk around tables
Abandon all reason
Avoid all eye contact
Do not react
Shoot the messengers

[Pre-Chorus 2]
This is a low flying panic attack
Sing the song of sixpence that goes

[Chorus]
Burn the witch
Burn the witch
We know where you live
We know where you live

[daily log: walking, 1km]

Caveat: PGH in Tehran

"PGH" is a kind of shorthand for Park Geun-hye, Korea's current president, who I also like to refer to as The Dictator's Daughter. 

Recently she has been on a high-level visit to Iran, now that Iran is "open for business" under the new nuclear agreement, and she can do so without antagonizing the Imperial powers in Washington and Brussels. Korea's economic presence is already huge in the region – bearing in mind that it is Korean construction contractors who have built major portions of infrastructure in Iran's neighbors United Arab Emirates to the south and Uzbekistan to the north. The Burj al-Khalifa might be in Dubai, but it was built by Koreans – a point of pride, here. 

Anyway, her visit is all over the news. I keep the Korean 24 hour news channel running sometimes on my TV at home. I noticed something that frankly surprised me, that vastly increased my estimation of President Park's intelligence. It's minor, perhaps: she has made a point of wearing an Iranian-style headscarf during her state visit to Tehran. Somehow this strikes me as a remarkable bit of cultural sensitivity. It's hard to imagine a European or American female politician making such a cultural concession. It may antagonize those who object to the clearly anti-feminist nature of the Iranian regime, and I have sympathy for that. But we should also acknowledge that PGH is no feminist – if she were, she'd never have won the presidency in Korea. It was just such gestures of obeissance to patriarchy that have made her political career possible in Korea. Basically, that she can extend such symbolic behavior into the international sphere speaks well of her level of political savvy and machiavelianism. 

I'm not saying I like her, but I think perhaps she is easy to underestimate. 

Pgh_tehran

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: Sartorial Advice

Yesterday the weather was quite warm. The seasonal transition from early Spring to late Spring has materialized, right on schedule. At work, the air conditioning is still not really operating yet – I'm not sure if this is due to recalcitrance on the part of those who make the decision to operate it, or some technical issue with priming it for the new season. Koreans often turn on and turn off heating and air conditioning systems based on calendar dates rather than actual weather. 

Classroom 204 was therefore beastly hot. Normally, I wear a kind of casual wool blazer at work – partly because it is kind of my uniform, partly because both in winter, when heating is inadequate, and in summer, when the air conditioning is too strong, it keeps me warm. Anyway, I took it off. It was too hot.

When I went to my next class, I still didn't have it. I guess since I wear it most of the time, it was notable that I didn't have it. 

"Teacher!" a fifth-grader named Jenny said. "Where is your jacket?"

"I took it off."

"Why?" she asked quite seriously, tilting her head, conveying a gravity and bafflement that seemed incommensurate with the triviality of the issue.

"It's too hot," I explained.

There was a period of silence. Then Jenny said, "Teacher! You need your jacket." Although she fishes around a lot for vocabulary, she has really good English intonation patterns, and this sounded impressively native.

I was surprised. "Need? Why?"

"It's more stylish," she explained, as if this was a critical and important factor.

"Ah. Good point."

Jenny and the other students waited for me to put on my jacket, before class proceeded.

[daily log: walking, 6.5km] 

Caveat: Soleboarding

I saw this video on youtube. Aside from guessing it would be very entertaining to a certain species of elementary school student (for which reason I bookmarked it and have shared it with a few classes, to universal acclaim), I was interested in it because I’m pretty sure this street is just a few blocks from my dad’s old house in L.A., although I can’t quite place it exactly.

The guy is “skating” on a slippery, steep hill of a street, during a rainy day. He’s doing so simply on the soles of his shoes, but he has some evident skateboarding skills, so he makes a great show of it.

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: Captain Bligh and the Cladistics

I had this weird dream that I was attending some university, and went to class to find that Captain Bligh was giving a lecture on cladistics.

Actually, this wasn't so surprising – in the past several days, I have consulted wikipedia articles on both topics: Captain Bligh and cladistics.

Here's what's weird, though: the reason I had consulted those wikipedia articles was because they had appeared separately in dreams, previously. So there's this strange conversation going on between wikipedia and my subconscious. I want in on it. I hate that feeling of being on the outside of a conversation where I have a clear interest, unable to break in or really understand what's going on. (Wait… that describes every single day, at work.)

About three days ago, I awoke (as I inevitably do, these days, several times a night, because this medication I'm taking seems to have shrunk my bladder) at around 3 am. I had been having a strange dream where some rioting Koreans were complaining about cladistics. Holding up signs with the word "cladistics" in red circles with red prohibition lines through them. I knew I had once known this word, but I couldn't quite recall what it was. So I grabbed my phone wikipediaed it, right then and there (isn't the 21st century interesting?). I (re-)learned all about cladistics, as I finally drifted back to sleep. I guess I must have studied it, at some point in the past, probably while fulfilling my botany minor as an undergraduate. I do find it interesting.

Then two nights ago, I had some dream fragment where I was with some of my students and we had to fight pirates. This isn't that implausible – pirates are fixtures of kids stories and cartoons everywhere, in today's global culture – and thus they come up now and then in class conversations and jokes and creative endeavors. I had forgotten the dream, until yesterday, sitting bored at work because no one had showed up for one of my classes (not that uncommon in the immediate post-test-prep period), I remembered the dream, and recalled that one of the pirates had been "Captain Bligh." Of course, this is ignorance. In googling Bligh, I (re-)learned that he was not a pirate, nor were his antagonists, the mutineers led by Fletcher Christian. Anyway, as before, I find it an interesting story. I find the person of Peter Heywood to be the story's most intriguing: going "native" in Tahiti, returned to Britain, condemned to death for mutiny, but pardoned and a career navel officer. It made me think, tangentially, that I need to get back to my recent aborted attempt to re-read Melville's Billy Budd.

That was all rather digressive, in an expository way. The point being, that last night, these two things came together again in the dream. The dream was borrowing from recent waking life – which is common enough. What is uncommon is that the recent waking life had been borrowing from dreams, in turn. Perhaps if I had been taking better notes, I would find earlier pointers from those previous dreams to waking life, again. Perhaps I could spiral, helix-like, back through dream and consciousness into my own remote past? Perhaps this could be the plot of a hard-to-understand novel that no one would read. Perhaps, Borges-like, just proposing the novel does most of the creative heavy lifting involved, and I can now rest satisfied.

I do need to rest, anyway. I woke up far too early, this morning, and have insomniated myself right through the overcast dawn. But I must go to work – it's Saturmorning and my "naesin semi-vacation" is over.

"Captain Bligh and the Cladistics" should be the name of a nerdcore hip-hop collective from somewhere in Polynesia, or perhaps Long Beach.

[daily log: walking, 6.5km]

Caveat: 노답

There is a bit of slang making the rounds with my students, that was interesting. 노답 [no-dap] means “no answer” – i.e. it’s used to express a kind of ironic or semi-ironic “no comment” or “I don’t want to dignify that with a response.”
But like a lot of Korean slang lately, it mixes English and Korean. The first syllable is English “no” while the second, 답, is Korean to mean “answer.”
I don’t really have much to say about this – just wanted to record the cultural observation, given its potential ephemerality. Also, I don’t have anything else to say today – the test-prep time has ended, and I’ve returned to my normal busier teaching schedule.
[daily log: walking, 6.5km]

Caveat: Why Should I?

Yesterday during my Davinci2B cohort, we have been practicing singing a few different pop songs for the May talent show event. These boys seem to enjoy singing – unlike a lot of kids who are too shy or inhibited by the prospect of trying to sing in English. They ask to do it, and seem very at ease with it, even if a few of them don't have the lyrics down perfectly. I particularly like when Paul, in response to the lyric "Take me into your loving arms," ad libs "Why should I?" Anyway, they chose the song themselves, from the catalogue of various English Language pop songs they have been exposed to.

Here they are singing.

 

 

Here are the lyrics they're singing.

 

"Thinking Out Loud"

 

When your legs don't work like they used to before

And I can't sweep you off of your feet

Will your mouth still remember the taste of my love?

Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks?

 

And, darling, I will be loving you 'til we're 70

And, baby, my heart could still fall as hard at 23

And I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways

Maybe just the touch of a hand

Well, me—I fall in love with you every single day

And I just wanna tell you I am

 

So, honey, now

Take me into your loving arms

Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars

Place your head on my beating heart

I'm thinking out loud

Maybe we found love right where we are

 

Here's the original song.

 

[daily log: walking, 6.5km]

Caveat: a luminous spring morning visit to the purifying land of the condemned and dying

…at the hospital for a check-up… update later.

2016-04-25 09.51.50.jpg

Update, a few hours later: In fact, I'm not sure that the luminosity is consequent to or despite the patina of yellow dust in the sky. Anyway, the news is not so bad. The doctor lauded my epithelials – high praise from an oral oncologist. Things are finally growing back, I guess, and perhaps we can attribute this to the medication regime. So we renewed the prescription, and will tackle some of the less pressing problems in the dental regime, next visit.

Here is another picture from my walk to the hospital. There were little pink lanterns hung from the trees – decorations for the upcoming Buddhamas.

2016-04-25 09.51.50.jpg

[daily log: walking, 11km]

Caveat: The Moonlight Done Long Run Out

Not much doing, on a Sunday.

What I'm listening to, right now.

Randy Houser, "Runnin' Outta Moonlight."

Lyrics.

Don't you worry 'bout gettin' fixed up
When you wake up, you're pretty enough
Look out your window at the cloud of dust
That's my headlights, that's my truck

Come on baby, don't you keep me waitin'
I gotta go, I've got a reservation
Tailgate for two underneath the stars
Kiss on your lips when you're in my arms

Whoa
Girl, every now and then you get a night like this
Whoa
This is one that we don't wanna miss, no

Come on baby let me take you on a night ride
Windows down, sittin' on my side
Tick tock now we're knocking on midnight
Me and you girl runnin' outta moonlight
I wanna hold you till the break of dawn
Hear the crickets sing a riverside love song
Hey baby, all we got is all night
Come on now we're runnin' outta moonlight

Girl I bet you thought I lost my mind
Outta the blue pulling into your drive
Wonder why I got you way out here
Have you ever seen a sky this clear

Whoa
Girl, you never look better than you do right now
Whoa
Oh heaven, let your light shine down

Come on baby let me take you on a night ride
Windows down, sittin' on my side
Tick tock now we're knocking on midnight
Me and you girl runnin' outta moonlight
I wanna hold you till the break of dawn
Hear the crickets sing a riverside love song
Hey baby, all we got is all night
Come on now we're runnin' outta moonlight

Whoa
Girl, every now and then you get a night like this
Whoa
This is one that we don't wanna miss, no

Come on baby let me take you on a night ride
Windows down, sittin' on my side
Tick tock now we're knocking on midnight
Me and you girl runnin' outta moonlight
I wanna hold you till the break of dawn
Hear the crickets sing a riverside love song
Hey baby, all we got is all night
Come on now we're runnin' outta moonlight

Hey baby don't it feel so right
Come on now we're runnin' outta moonlight
All I wanna do is hold you tight
Come on, come on, come on we're runnin' outta moonlight

Whoa
Yea we're runnin' outta moonlight
Whoa

 

[daily log: walking, 1km]

Caveat: We out

Prince_love_symbolI guess Prince (Prince Rogers Nelson) died this morning. In fact, I was not a huge fan of his music, but he is of my generation, and of my adopted city (Minneapolis), and his music and cultural impact were both ubiquitous in my college years. Certainly I think he was quite talented, an original artist and thinker, and entirely deserving of his fame and fans. I can conjure several of his songs into my mind without prompts, including "1999" and "Purple Rain," and and I saw the movie of the same title as the latter, "Purple Rain," many times. Probably the thing Prince did that I found most interesting, as a linguist, was when he changed his name to an unpronounciable symbol (at right), and for a number of years was therefore known as "The Artist formerly known as Prince." This appealed to my interest in absurdist and Borgesian linguistic follies.

I would have preferred to put a Prince song, below, but… well, he was also quite assiduous in his control of his creative output, including his long-standing dispute with his music label, and his famous quote that working for his label was like slavery. Because of that, quality youtube videos of his music are quite hard to find. I would have posted a less well-known song, perhaps something with political content, like his 1981 "Ronnie, Talk To Russia." I suggest you go find it somewhere, if you're interested. 

Meanwhile, since that's not available, here's something utterly unrelated and of a different genre and epoch. 

What I'm listening to right now.

Nothing But Thieves, "Excuse Me."

Lyrics.

His space crowds out your space, your space
Your space crowds out hers
Coffee breath and headphone hiss
But no one says a word

Eyes upon the paper headline
Refuge in your phone
Bumping shoulders
Cough and sniff
But no one says hello

Woahhh
Excuse me while I run, I really gotta get out of here
Woahhh
Excuse me while I run, I really gotta get out of here

My heart beats like yours does, hers does,
Her heart keeps good time
And everyday I mind the gap between you and me
Here comes someone else to share the air we breathe

Woahhh
Excuse me while I run, I really gotta get out of here
Woahhh
Reach out for anyone, and they will tell you get out of here
Woahhh
I'm asking everyone, you've gotta help me get out of here
Woahhh
Excuse me while I run, I really gotta get out of here

Meanwhile
Under the gun
Hey everyone
Our work here is done
We out
You gonna come?
Hey everyone
Our work here is done

Woahhh
Excuse me while I run, I really gotta get out of here
Woahhh
Reach out for anyone and they will tell you get out of here
Woahhh
I'm asking everyone, you've gotta help me get out of here
Woahhh
Excuse me while I run, I really gotta get out of here

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: Except for me

In my Honors cohort, in the debate book, the proposition was something like, "Girls should not wear make-up until age 15." Perhaps unsurprisingly, elementary students actually have some opinions about this topic, and it feels more accessible than many debate topics. But in Korea, a land of still very traditional gender roles, it is also essentially accessible only to half the students: i.e., the boys don't really care, and don't see it as relevant, even if they have opinions. Anyway, one of the "further thinking" questions, in response to the text we read in the book, was something to the effect of, "Do you think kids are maturing faster these days?"

A slightly diminutive fifth-grader named Soyeon, who had expressed that she had tried to wear make-up and her mom had gotten mad at her, immediately raised her hand. "Oh definitely," she averred.

Then, quickly and cleverly, she added, "Except for me." This was pretty funny.

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: The Dust in the Machine

My computer stopped working, this morning. It produced a short-lived, sort of high pitched moan, and then just stopped. I had been noticing some weird sounds from the cooling fan, so I decided to take a look.

I found a lot of dust clogging up the cooling fan. Hm. Yes, there is a lot of dust in Korea, and in my apartment. I guess the computer internalized this. So to speak.

2016-04-20_dust2

I cleaned out the dust, and started my computer.

It's so quiet now.

Plus, now I have a large dust bunny. It doesn't do very much, though. It just sits there.

[daily log: walking, 6.5km]

Caveat: 산토끼를 잡으려다가 집토끼를 놓친다

I learned this aphorism from my friend’s blog.

산토끼를 잡으려다가 집토끼를 놓친다
san.to.kki.reul jap.eu.ryeo.da.ga jip.to.kki.reul noh.chin.da
wild-hare-OBJ catch-PURPOSIVE/TRANSFERATIVE tame-rabbit-OBJ miss-PRES

This means, “Losing rabbits at home while running after hares in the mountains.” My friend Peter points to Korea Times senior editorialist Choi Sung-jin having used the expression in translation, commenting on the opposition party’s strategy – prior to the election. Thus the translation is due to that editorialist. The phrase could also apply to other misguided business strategies, I think. I need to remember it for the next time I feel annoyed in a work-meeting.
In retrospect, I think this was not the right sort of aphorism to quote, given the opposition’s surprising electoral upset. It turned out the wild hare made a better meal.
[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: The Wrath of Kant

I spent a major portion of my morning reading most of the entire series of comics posted at the site existentialcomics.com. I don't know who the author is or much about why this comic exists. But I found it all quite entertaining, and I laughed many times. This kind of humor is not accessible to everyone, I know.

The title for this blog post comes from a comic about the philosopher David Hume, serving as captain of the Starship Enterprise. He meets his nemesis, Kant. This doesn't go well, as we can predict from the original story.

Kant

[daily log: walking, 1.5km]

Caveat: A few more thoughts on Korean psephology

One realization I had in looking at the election coverage yesterday (both on my TV and on the internet), was that my long-standing characterization of Ilsan (and Goyang) as fairly conservative is simply wrong. I don't really know what the basis was for that impression, but I've probably mentioned it more than once in this blog. Yet in looking at the election data, I can see that northwest suburban Seoul (indeed, most of suburban Seoul) definitely leans leftward.

What really made me notice this was the breakthrough realization that the electoral district just to the east of where I live (called 고양갑 Goyang-gap) is the home district of the just re-elected left-most member of the National Assembly, Sim Sang-jung (심상정). I had this realization in studying the electoral map, where the yellow stands out (because it represents only two districts nationally). The yellow represents the Justice Party (정의당), which is a left-leaning party – the color choices are based on party "brand" colors, but seem to be somewhat coordinated for contrast between the groups (whether by some government agency such the elections commission, I'm not sure). The map below is reproduced from wikipedia.

2016-04-13 polling place

Anyway, I after making this realization, I took the time to look back at previous electoral maps, and indeed, this leftward slant on Goyang is not recent. So I have no idea where I got the idea that Goyang was conservative – the electoral evidence belies it. So consider my earlier characterizations retracted. 

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: 2016총선

Korea voted for parliamentary representatives yesterday (this is called 총선, “general election”). The atmosphere as I walked to work was quite strange – a “real” holiday. The schools were closed and workers are given time off (half days or complete off days depending on their work type and schedule, but the hagwon business, such as where I work, is exempt from this and so we worked as normal). There were lots of senior citizens going in and out of polling places, and parents were out in playgrounds playing with their kids. It was nice, and the feeling was vaguely festive.
My friend Peter has been blogging in a very detailed and interesting manner about election-related issues. I have enjoyed reading his thoughts. I haven’t, myself, been following these elections as closely as in the past – I have been feeling a kind of bitter resignation about the phenomenal lock on power held by the conservatives in Korea, and this election appeared to be only a further entrenchment of this “neo-Parkism,” embodied by the presidency of the dictator’s daughter, with a fragmented opposition that seemed destined to do badly.
In fact, the opposition didn’t do so badly, on preliminary results – I have been looking at Naver News’ summary coverage (in Korean). The president’s 새누리당 (Saenuri Party) lost its parliamentary majority, Ahn Cheol-soo’s new third party, 국민의당 (People’s Party) did remarkably well, and even the 더문주당 (Minjoo Party) surprised at least me by turning Gyeonggi blue on the electoral map, despite losing their main stronghold in the southwest to the upstarts. Turnout was higher than in the last several elections.
I walked past 4 different polling places on the way to work (all schools). Below is the Ilsan Service Industry Workers Vocational High School (called, optimistically, the “International Convention High School”, but really a dumping ground for Ilsan’s least ambitious students), with a polling place banner across the entrance gate.
2016-04-13 polling place
[daily log: walking, 7km]
 

Caveat: This is my style

In my Davinci2 cohort yesterday, my 5th grade student who goes by the name Paul was reading a short paragraph from the book for us. His pronunciation was utterly incoherent, which was not commensurate with his normal ability, I thought – he's not great, but he's not quite so bad as to be impossible to understand. He was sounding like a drunk robot.

"What's going on, Paul?" I asked. "Why are you talking like that?"

Without pause, and now quite clearly, he said, "This is my style." He sat up straight, grinning with pride. 

I had to laugh at that. "Well, uh… go ahead, then." 

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: Never been seen

I guess it was a pretty lousy weekend. I have some kind of mild flu. 

What I'm listening to right now.

Indicator Indicator, "Your Cocoon." The group is from my favorite Canadian city: Winnipeg.

Lyrics.

You've never missed a step
You haven't taken one yet
Cinched to an inch it's time you knew
You're still stuck in your cocoon

Feels it was always meant to be
You fill it up so perfectly
But know you'll never grow up anytime soon
While you're stuck in your cocoon

You're armoured but it's welded shut
So green that it's obscene
You think your wings are these splendid things
But baby they've never been seen
Never been seen

Oh, you're the first to laugh
And, oh, we love you for that
But it's time to cut the cord and spit out that spoon
Let's get you out of your cocoon

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: Svekolny for Christmas Dinner with the Presidents

I haven't been sleeping well, lately. I attribute the issue to some of the side-effects of this medication, but there may be other things going on too – it's spring, and that means a lot more allergens in the air, as well as many smoggy days in Korea.

I awoke last night at around 3 am, from a very vivid and complex, novelistic dream. The main outline of it was that I invited Vladimir Putin to Christmas dinner – not once, but twice. The first time, it was somehow in response to some kind of weird contest – he was visiting Korea and so there was some kind of contest and next thing you know, Putin was visiting me for Christmas dinner. Of course, I didn't know what to do. I tried to make some svekolny (a kind of Russian beet and garlic salad), but there were also some strange Mexican dishes, as well as sides of things like kimchi. It was all kind of ad hoc, and Putin, with an entourage, showed up and was polite. But when he went to try the svekolny, he made a terrible face and accused me of trying to poison him. This caused the to-be-expected media conflaguration: "American in Korea tries to poison the Russian president!"

Somehow, I convinced the Korean authorities that it was all a mistake, and the case was dropped. And then there was a "fast-forward" in the dream (novelistically), and it was the next Christmas. I sent Putin an email message to his personal email (which I somehow had access to because of the previous year's events). I told him that this year, I would do better, if he came to Christmas dinner.

This time, instead of at my apartment, I borrowed one of my coworker's larger apartments, and coworkers from Karma helped me prepare. I made more Russian dishes, including svekolny, and I also made a turkey and some traditional American food.

I didn't hear from Putin until Christmas Eve, when, unexpectedly, he sent me a message accepting my invitation. This time, the Korean politicians tried to get in on the publicity, and President Park showed up (she was wearing a Korean hanbok – traditional Korean clothing). In the dream, she was being very polite to me, like I was some kind of celebrity, but one of her police protection agents pulled me aside, and told me in a frighteningly cold tone that if I screwed this up, I would be expelled from Korea forever. In the dream, I wasn't worried.

Some of my coworkers were there, and I also invited some of my favorite students – about 20 of them. But when the Russian FSB agents showed up prior to Putin's arrival (to clear the area's security, I guess), they said that the children were too dangerous, and would not be allowed to see the Russian president. 

President Park was put off by this, and she said she would go with the children into the other room. But the children said they didn't want her there, so dejectedly she returned to the dining room just as Putin showed up. 

He sat down and leaned close, almost whispering. "You are very brave," he said. He was speaking Russian, but somehow, I understood him (which maybe makes sense – I did, after all, study Russian for two years in college). 

"Why am I brave?" I asked. He was so close I could smell his breath.

"To invite me back. Because of this, I respect you." 

I felt like I was talking to some kind of Mafia boss. He asked me what I thought about the Panama Papers (here we see the "current events" issue that perhaps brought about the dream?). 

I told him that I thought that the world was showing a double standard – everyone is all for online privacy, but if you're rich and powerful, you're not allowed privacy, in the name of "transparency." This argument is actually one that has occurred to me, but I'm not sure I fully endorse it. In the dream, I suppose I was trying to ingratiate myself with the Russian president, so as not to antagonize him. After all, my stay in Korea now was contingent on success.

I offered him my svekolny. He tasted it, and made the same disgusted, horrified face as he had last time. My heart fell, and I saw the Korean secret service agent glaring at me. 

Putin looked around, and appeared to notice President Park for the first time. "Try some," he said, like a serpent. "It's delicious." 

"I only eat Korean food," she averred, shaking her head.

Putin took several more bites, struggling to eat it. I wondered what I had done wrong – it tasted OK to me. But then again, my sense of taste is pretty deficient, these days.

He did not complain, however. He persevered through the rest of the meal quite politely. He asked me what I thought of Trump. I told him my sincere opinion. He made another face, but he said nothing. President Park was looking annoyed, because he wasn't talking to her at all. He was talking to Curt and Helen, from work. They seemed smitten by him, but I was only impressed with his tact – that he was clearly putting up with this for some ulterior reason of his own.

He left, with his security detail, without further incident. Park and the other Koreans left too. I went in the other room to check on my students. They were very curious to hear how it went. As I told the rapt kids about the experience, I fingered a very short "thank you" email to Putin on my smart phone. I asked him why he had tolerated my terrible cooking.

Almost instantly, I got an answer. "You showed great strength of character, asking me back, and so out of respect I had to eat it. It was truly terrible." His email included a smiley emoticon in the Korean style: ^_^. 

That was a very strange dream

[daily log: walking, 1km]

Caveat: 閑雲野鶴

This is a four-character idiom I learned from my building’s elevator the other day.

閑雲野鶴
한운야학
han.un.ya.hak
leisure-cloud-field-crane

The meaning in the Korean-English dictionary is given as only, “wandering clouds and wild cranes,” but the example use of the expression gives a clue: 한운 야학 야학을 벗삼다 lead a leisurely life/lead a life free from worldly care in the bosom of nature. I found the following definition in Korean, online, which I laboriously translated.

한가로운 구름 아래 노니는 들의 학. 벼슬과 어지러운 세상을 버리고 강호에 묻혀 사는 사람.
Cranes wandering fields under peaceful skies. People who abandon official posts and chaotic society to take refuge in nature.

So I guess it means people who “escape” society in some way, but it is not clear to me if this viewed positively or negatively by the expression. Sometimes it seems I might do that. Or it seems I might already have tried that – but unsuccessfully.


What I’m listening to right now.

The Cure, “Splintered In Her Head.” I’m not sure this is related to the idiom.
[daily log: walking, 1km]
 

Caveat: Neo-know-nothingism

The following is an incomplete thought.

There is the confusion of character and luck. I've been struck by this, for example, in the thinking of my students… but I can't quite figure out if it is more closely related to their being Korean or to their being children. I suspect both factors may be involved, at some level. There is something childish about thinking this way, but there is also a strong cultural trope in the Buddhasphere, related to notions of karma, which tell us that one's luck is tied to one's moral character, which is a result, in turn, of the idea of accumulating merit (and/or demerit) across multiple lives.

Recently, this thought crystallized for me, though, in relation to some writing about Trump. Trump appears to espouse this conflation of luck and character, and in general, it seems to be a way of thinking that is on the increase in American culture. Hence, Trump's condemnation of McCain as a loser, for example, since McCain had the bad luck to be captured by the North Vietnamese.

An economics and political blogger named Chris Dillow labels this type of thinking "feudalist," and although that is true, I'd simply say it is "pre-modern," since it underlies all kinds of caste-based systems, from untouchables in India to know-nothingism and the eugenics movement in America.

Speaking of which, I'd like to label Trump's new movement "neo-know-nothingism" – it has a nice, hard-to-pronounce euphony.

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: The inside of my brain

Yesterday at work I was in a meeting where I was quite unclear what was going on. Someone from outside of Karma was discussing some issues with some online pedagogic software we use with some of our students, called Cappytown

Anyway, I was at a loss – I understood some of the details, because I was familiar with some aspects of the software. However, I had no idea why I had been called into the meeting or what it was for, in broader outline. Even now, I'm somewhat confused.

During the meeting, I drew a picture on my notes.

20160406 doodle

 

[daily log: walking, 6km]

 

Caveat: viejo dios todos los días

EL VIEJO Y LA PÓLVORA

                                    A Jesús Arellano

Viejo sangre de toro
viejo marino anciano de las nieves
viejo de guerras de enfermerías
de heridas

Viejo con piel de flor
viejo santo de tanto amor
viejo de juventud niño de canas
viejo amadasantamente loco de amor siempre
viejo perro soldado
anciano de los trópicos
viejo hasta lo eterno
joven hasta el espacio azul de muerte
Viejo viejo cazador
matador amador
amante amante amante amante
Puntual exactamente amante
lento y certero
marino viejo tempestad y bochorno
sudor de manos

Viejo dios todos los días
de Dios escribir amar beber maldecir
beber tu propia sangre
viejo sangre de res
bendita seas maldita sangre tuya
cuando el disparo
seco bestial rotundo como un templo mancillado
degolló la marea la selva la cumbre las heridas
el amor total el infortunio la dicha la embriaguez
y un rostro dio fulgores amarillos a la muerte
y un ataúd de pólvora un ataúd un ataúd
y dos palabras
Ernest Hemingway

– Efraín Huerta (poeta mexicano, 1914-1982)

El poema refiere a la novela hemingwayana, El viejo y el mar (The Old Man and the Sea) y al suicidio del autor. Hemingway es uno de los escritores norteamericanos más respetados en el ámbito literario hispanoamericano. Como he notado antes, aunque Huerta no es mi poeta favorito, tengo para con él un sentimiento especial, a causa de que fue el primer poeta que leía en español – en la misma sala de conferencia en la Casa de los Amigos a que hice referencia en el blog anterior. En leer este poema, también veo que claramente me influyó en mis propios esfuerzos poéticos subsiguientes.
picture[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: How I didn’t become a Quaker in Mexico City 30 years ago

I started writing about this several weeks ago, but dropped the ball.

200707_MexicoDF_CasaAC08030 years ago, in March, 1986, I started my job at the Casa de los Amigos in Mexico City. This was a transformative experience for me, in several ways.

The Casa de los Amigos is a kind of hybrid between a Quaker meetinghouse, a social services organization, and a hostel for travelers. It's all of those things. It has been all of those things for 70 or 80 years now – my uncle (my father's older brother) worked with projects affiliated with the Casa in the 1950s. I worked there in the 1980s. And the Casa still exists and is quite active. The "Amigos" of the name refers to the "Friends" i.e. Quakers AKA Society of Friends. The Mexico City meeting also maintains a tight connection with the Orange Grove Friends Meeeting of Pasadena, California, which was the community my grandparents were members of when my father was born, and of which, in a kind of biographical full circle, my father is now once again an active member, 76 years later.

That period was the time in my life when I came closest to adopting the Quakerism that was my "birthright." Ultimately, my year of working for the Quakers in Mexico City was a positive experience, but it also mostly convinced me that I could never be a "true" Quaker, because I was forced for the first time to face my fundamental atheism, and for me to have become a "social" Quaker (as is true of so many Quakers, who are active but who are not religious or spiritual) struck me as hypocritical. It would take more than a decade more before my reluctant acceptance of my own atheism gelled into a kind of "faith," but I suppose that year of attending Sunday meeting and interacting with Quakers was the beginning. My more recent flirtation with Buddhism is likely also ultimately enabled by that experience, too – it differs from my early attempt at Quakerism only in that Buddhism, unlike even the most unconventianal forms of Christianity such as Quakerism, neither presumes nor requires any doctrinal belief, and thus remains available to atheists such as myself.

Another seed that was planted in Mexico City was that that was my first experience as a teacher, and it was as an EFL teacher, at that. Which is my current career. 

That was also where I learned (truly learned) Spanish, which facilitated my later studies in linguistics and literature, and which enriched my "life of the mind" substantially. Even today, after 8 years resident in Korea, I still speak or read or write something in Spanish every day, if only a fragment here or there.

For all these reasons, my year at the Casa de los Amigos was formative, and transformative, and 30 years later, I remember my time there vividly and proudly. 

At right, above, is a picture I took of the front of the Casa when I visited there in 2007. Below is a view out the back window of the conference room, toward the hulking form of the Monumento de la Revolución a few blocks south, also taken in 2007.

200707_MexicoDF_008

[daily log: walking, 6.5km]

Caveat: Like golden rays of sun in the cloud

I am having a very busy week. I've been putting extra hours in prep time at work, posting grades, planning some curriculum for a new class, and doing some other bureaucratic pursuits. 

In parallel with starting this new medication (see Monday's post), which features some not-so-pleasant side effects, I am feeling more exhausted than I have been in a long time. 

So… sorry, I'm not posting very interestingly, lately. I have my little "stockpile" of pre-started blogpost drafts… things collected at various times, from which I can grab some random thing (mostly poetry, or music, or occasionally bits of online humor) when something new doesn't occur to me.  These posts tend to come across as a bit impersonal, I guess. As of today, that stockpile is empty. 

What I'm listening to right now.

Röyksopp, "You Don't Have A Clue." Of course, I blogged this song before. But I didn't post the lyrics, then, as I hadn't yet fixed on that little habit. And, it was a long time ago.  So again, then.

Lyrics.

It's late in the night, dancing is done
The music has died, you're ready to run

But you don't have a clue, this party hasn't ended yet
Not for me and you, now you're just pretending

You're hiding from yourself
Yes you are, yes you are
Like golden rays of sun in the cloud

We're meant to be one, I know we are
If I am the sky, then you are my star

Hey you don't have a clue, this party never ended
Not for me and you, I know you're just pretending

You're hiding from yourself
Yes you are, yes you are
Like golden rays of sun in the cloud

I will make you see
Haven't you got, haven't you got it yet?
Just lay down for a while, next to me

Didn't mean to make you panic
I didn't mean to put you off
Baby it's the way that you've got me
I listen to my heart and it takes you high
And you ask me how
Can I show you how
I need your love right now, now, now

[daily log: walking, 6.5]

Caveat: Riannon, uerch Heueyd Hen, wyf i, a’m rodi y wr o’m hanwod yd ydys.

At the University of Minnesota, in 1988, I took a class on the Medieval Welsh language. I don't know why. I think I had this idea of trying to connect with my alleged Welsh heritage (the family name "Way" is Welsh in origin, cognate with "Vaughn" and "Waugh," and bears no relation to the English word "way" meaning means or road). 

It was one of the most difficult classes I ever took. Yet I remember it quite fondly.

Most of the other students had some background that would be appropriate – either knowledge of Modern Welsh, or work with some other cognate language, like Irish or Scots Gaelic. All I had was some linguistics and Latin. The first day, the professor handed us this text.

Pwyll Pendeuic Dyuet a oed yn arglwyd ar seith cantref Dyuet. A threigylgweith yd oed yn Arberth, prif lys idaw, a dyuot yn y uryt ac yn y uedwl uynet y hela. Sef kyueir o'y gyuoeth a uynnei y hela, Glynn Cuch. Ac ef a gychwynnwys y nos honno o Arberth, ac a doeth hyt ym Penn Llwyn Diarwya, ac yno y bu y nos honno. A thrannoeth yn ieuengtit y dyd kyuodi a oruc, a dyuot y Lynn Cuch i ellwng e gwn dan y coet. A chanu y gorn a dechreu dygyuor yr hela, a cherdet yn ol y cwn, ac ymgolli a'y gydymdeithon. Ac ual y byd yn ymwarandaw a llef yr erchwys, ef a glywei llef erchwys arall, ac nit oedynt unllef, a hynny yn dyuot yn erbyn y erchwys ef. Ac ef a welei lannerch yn y coet o uaes guastat; ac ual yd oed y erchwys ef yn ymgael ac ystlys y llannerch, ef a welei carw o ulaen yr erchwys arall. A pharth a pherued y llannerch, llyma yr erchwys a oed yn y ol yn ymordiwes ac ef, ac yn y uwrw y'r llawr.

We also had a "reference grammar". I had already acquired a (modern) Welsh dictionary.

We had to translate the text, which was the introductory passage from Pwyll Pendeuic Dyuet – a bit of Welsh mythology from the Mabinogion (Red Book of Hergest). I actually managed it. It was very hard. Eventually, we translated the entire story, along with some Welsh poetry and other medieval snippets.

This intensive experience has led to the story of Pwyll and Rhiannon (a Welsh horse godess) being one of the most vivid stories resident in my imagination.

Here is the part where Rhiannon first appears, in the story.

Yna y dywot Pwyll. "A uorwyn," heb ef, " yr mwyn y gwr mwyhaf a gery, arho ui." "Arhoaf yn llawen," heb hi, "ac oed llessach y'r march, pei ass archut yr meityn." Sewyll, ac arhos a oruc y uorwyn, a gwaret y rann a dylyei uot am y hwyneb o wisc y phenn, ac attal y golwc arnaw, a dechreu ymdidan ac ef. "Arglwydes," heb ef, " pan doy di, a pha gerdet yssyd arnat ti?" "Kerdet wrth uy negesseu," heb hi, "a da yw gennyf dy welet ti." "Crassaw wrthyt y gennyf i," heb ef. Ac yna medylyaw a wnaeth, bot yn diuwyn ganthaw pryt a welsei o uorwyn eiroet, a gwreic, y wrth y ffryt hi. "Arglwydes," heb ef, "a dywedy di ymi dim o'th negesseu?" "Dywedaf, y rof a Duw," heb hi. "Pennaf neges uu ymi, keissaw dy welet ti." "Llyna," heb y Pwyll, " y neges oreu gennyf i dy dyuot ti idi. Ac a dywedy di ymi pwy wyt?" "Dywedaf, Arglwyd," heb hi. "Riannon, uerch Heueyd Hen, wyf i, a'm rodi y wr o'm hanwod yd ydys. Ac ny mynneis innheu un gwr, a hynny o'th garyat ti. Ac nys mynnaf etwa, onyt ti a'm gwrthyt. Ac e wybot dy attep di am hynny e deuthum i." "Rof i a Duw," heb ynteu Pwyll, "llyna uy attep i iti, pei caffwn dewis ar holl wraged a morynnyon y byt, y mae ti a dewisswn." "Ie," heb hitheu, "os hynny a uynny, kyn uy rodi y wr arall, gwna oed a mi." "Goreu yw gennyf i," heb y Pwyll, "bo kyntaf; ac yn y lle y mynnych ti, gwna yr oet." "Gwnaf, Arglwyd," heb hi, "blwydyn y heno, yn llys Heueyd, mi a baraf bot gwled darparedic yn barawt erbyn dy dyuot." "Yn llawen," heb ynteu, "a mi a uydaf yn yr oet hwnnw." "Arglwyd," heb hi, "tric yn iach, a choffa gywiraw dy edewit, ac e ymdeith yd af i.

Rhiannon_by_alan_leeTranslations of the Mabinogion abound online - I'll not attempt to replicate my undergraduate feat of translation. At right, is a painting of Rhiannon, by Alan Lee, in his illustration of the Mabinogion.

 

 

 

 


What I'm listening to right now.

Fleetwood Mac, "Rhiannon."

Lyrics.

Rhiannon rings like a bell through the night
And wouldn't you love to love her?
Takes through the sky like a bird in flight
And who will be her lover?

All your life you've never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you Heaven?
Will you ever win?

She is like a cat in the dark
And then she is the darkness
She rules her life like a fine skylark
And when the sky is starless

All your life you've never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you Heaven?
Will you ever win? Will you ever win?
[| From: https://www.elyrics.net/read/f/fleetwo… |]

Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Rhiannon

She rings like a bell through the night
And wouldn't you love to love her?
She was alive like a bird in flight
And who will be her lover?

All your life you've never seen a woman
Taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you Heaven?
Will you ever win? Will you ever win?

Rhiannon
Rhiannon
Rhiannon

Taken by, taken by the sky
Taken by, taken by the sky
Taken by, taken by the sky

Dreams unwind
Love's a state of mind
Dreams unwind
Love's a state of mind

[daily log: walking, 6.5km]

Caveat: castles of glass

Tournez, Tournez, Bon Chevaux De Bois

Turn, turn again,
Ape's blood in each vein!
The people that pass
Seem castles of glass,
The old and the good
Giraffes of the blue wood,
The soldier, the nurse,
Wooden-face and a curse,
Are shadowed with plumage
Like birds, by the gloomage.
Blond hair like a clown's
The music floats—drowns
The creaking of ropes,
The breaking of hopes,
The wheezing, the old,
Like harmoniums scold;
Go to Babylon, Rome,
The brain-cells called home,
The grave, new Jerusalem—
Wrinkled Methusalem!
From our floating hair
Derived the first fair
And queer inspiration
Of music, the nation
Of bright-plumed trees
And harpy-shrill breeze . . .
* * * *
Turn, turn again,
Ape's blood in each vein!

– Edith Sitwell (British poet, 1887-1964)

The lines "The people that pass / Seem castles of glass" reminded me of Cervantes' tale, "El licenciado Vidriera."

I had intended to write something more interesting today, but I lost my motivation. It might be under the pile of papers on my desk.

[daily log: walking, 6km]

Caveat: Happyfun Hospitaltime

I went to the hospital this morning, for one of my check-ups. I saw a new doctor – Dr Min, an oral cancer and post-op oral specialist (sort of a "cancer dentist"). His English is quite good – which sometimes is not such a good thing. You see, doctors have a tendency to digress on "worst-case scenarios." This is not information I really can use, and it creates a lot of anxiety for me. 

The news is not entirely bad. I guess there has been some slow closure of the exposed bone at the back of my lower jaw, but he's quite concerned over just how slow. Mostly, it didn't feel positive. "It could open up again," he mused. Hygiene will remain an ongoing problem. There are some other "lesions" too. No reason for biopsy at this point, given the periodic CT scans, but something we should keep an eye on. 

Dr Min has given me a prescription of a medication which "might" help accelerate the recovery of healthy flesh in the affected area. This use of the drug, called pentoxifylline (under brand name 페렌탈 in Korea), seems to be "off-label," but the doctor suggested that in my unsual case it could help, since the consequences of the necrosis in my mouth are similar to the "peripheral artery" problems for which the medication is normally indicated – specifically, the scary-sounding gangrene.

With respect to neuropathic pain (i.e. "ghost pain" related to severed nerves in my mouth and tongue), he was less helpful. He said in most cases, unless it is incapacitating, the best approach is to simply "endure" it. Most non-opioid painkillers aren't useful (which I already knew), and opioids, of course, have other issues. 

I certainly am not feeling particularly positive. Lately, I have felt like the quality of my teaching is declining, I feel uncreative in my my creative pursuits (writing or art), and of course I continue to reliably make zero net progress on my Korean ability. 

Last night, coming back on the subway from my effort to be social and active in Seoul yesterday, I just felt tired and frustrated. I had a weird epiphanic insight, as I sat watching the people around me. One reason I used to enjoy traveling is that I have always enjoyed "people-watching." One reason that I don't seem to enjoy traveling any more is that I find people-watching to be a much less positive experience. Instead, it has become a kind of burden. It's not that I've lost my interest in and curiosity about those around me. Rather, it seems that the problem is that this curiosity and interest is now tempered by a kind of simmering background jealousy. That is not a becoming emotion, I realize. Perhaps it is not wise for me to confess it, here. But it's a real thing, definitely – I have this sort of anger or frustration at the fact that most other people seem to lead these relatively (relatively) carefree existences, without looming health issues or limited horizons of the possible. I feel that I am at risk of becoming a bitter old man. That is not a desirable outcome.

It's easy for me to find optimism about humanity, but harder to find it about myself.

[daily log: walking, 10.5km]

Caveat: A crushing easter

I went into Seoul today, meeting my friend Peter and doing a walking-tour thing. I'll tell more about it tomorrow, maybe.

Meanwhile, unrelatedly… this guy crushes things with his hydraulic press and posts videos of his activities on youtube. As a bonus, he has a kind of evil-sounding laugh.

I feel that this is the pinnacle of our civilization's culture.

[daily log: walking, 4.5km]

Caveat: The knowledge runs down

I awoke from a dream this morning. I was going to medical school in Mexico City.

Although it sounds preposterous, there are elements in my background that make this dream-plot more plausible, at least as a dream, than one might expect. When I lived in Mexico City in the 1980s, one of my coworkers, Joaquín, was studying in medical school (keeping in mind the caveat that at that time, a medical degree in Mexico was a baccalaureate degree. So at that time, I was immersed in a kind of second-hand medical education. Later, finishing my own undergraduate work, I studied quite a few botany courses, from which I derived a kind of comfort with biological discourses. More recently, since my cancer, I have developed a habit of trying hard to understand as much as possible about the various medical situations and treatments I have experienced, which has evolved into a kind of "hobby" of reading online medical blogs.

Anyway, that's just background, in an effort to understand how my brain managed to put together this dream, maybe. It wasn't that detailed. I was at my workplace in Mexico City, the main difference being that I was in medical school too – not just Joaquín. Of course, I was studying things related to cancer. I was having a difficult time, however. I couldn't seem to remember any of the various things I needed to memorize. Finally I looked over at Joaquín, and he just grinned. He had one of the fat textbooks open but was wearing it like a hat on the top of his head.

"What are you doing?" I asked. There was a weird echo, and when I looked around, I wasn't in my workplace but rather inside a hospital – kind of a cross between the Cancer Center here in Korea and the hospital where I spent some time in Mexico City. 

Joaquín looked like he was ready to perform surgery – except for the book on his head. He didn't answer for a while. So I asked him again, "What are you doing?"

Finally, he said laconically, "The knowldege runs down from the book into your brain."

[daily log: walking, 7.5km]

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