I have been known to log on to some chat utility or another (i.e. AIM or Yahoo) to interact with some long-lost acquaintances now and then. There are lot of bots lurking out there in these nether parts of the internet. Mostly, of course, one wants to ignore such things as bots. But the other day I was inspired, I decided to see what the bot had to say for itself. I was unimpressed, except by my own strangeness. I have changed the usernames to protect the innocent and the guilty.
bogybaggle: heya.
jaredrobot: really?
bogybaggle: hey! 21/femaIe here. you?
jaredrobot: robot. indeterminate age.
bogybaggle: NO i am not a bot
jaredrobot: i know. i am.
bogybaggle: hmm….. have we ever chatted be4?
jaredrobot: yes. we are one and the same. one mind. hive mind.
bogybaggle: oh sorry…. i am reaIIy forgetfuII sometimes. but anyways whats up?
jaredrobot: i'm suffering from an epistemological crisis.
bogybaggle: hey i have some pictures of me on my profiIe on this site if you wouId Iike to see them?
jaredrobot: i don't have the ability to integrate visual data.
bogybaggle:
yeah? ok weII you wiII have to signup there to make sure that your not a
kid because i have a coupIe R rated pictures on there
bogybaggle: but dontt worry it is completly free and easy to signup. heres the signup page https://[redacted]
jaredrobot: kid robot. you're a genius.
bogybaggle: A bot? not hardly babe. Are you?
jaredrobot: yep.
bogybaggle: when u get Iogged in then search for my profiIe bogybaggle.
bogybaggle: if u want to see my R rated pics. the gaIlIery password is xxxfun
jaredrobot: yes, mistress. i'm yours to command.
bogybaggle: brb.
jaredrobot: that's what they all say.
What I'm listening to right now.
Bumblebeez 81, "I Come With Water."
[This is a back-post, written at the date shown but only saved in draft form for a very long time. I finally decided to go through and officially "post" a bunch of old draft posts lying around.]