Caveat: 제 눈에 안경

제 눈에     안경
my eye-LOC glasses
[…like] glasses on my eyes.
“Through rose-colored glasses,” basically. Looks good, as I see it.
This is simple, and useful. I will sometime use it.
I slept very strangely last night. Longer than usual. I don’t remember anything after lying down, though I know I must have read for a while. And now I feel hollow, strangely not-fully-present. What’s up?

Caveat: Yet More Premium Procrastination

So after all the procrastination associated with renewing my visa, I thought I'd have a break from the procrastination-guilt after it finally got renewed.

Unfortunately, I've found a new thing to procrastinate on – I have to go get a medical check-up / drug-screening, now – it's a requirement for the provincial education office for all hagwon teachers (not just foreign ones). I have to go to a hospital and get the screening, but I keep not going to do it. This morning, I had resolved to finally go and get it done, but then I woke up, and in my blurry morning routine, immediately consumed two cups of coffee and a bowl of rice. Unfortunately, you're supposed to fast for the screening. Um. Oops. Was that a freudian avoidance-thing going on?

I guess tomorrow. Sigh.

What I'm listening to right now.

Lianne La Havas, "Forget." This track is awesome.

Caveat: Lego Movies

pictureMy friend Bob sent me a link to a Lego movie on the Lego website. He has son who is fascinated by these things, which is why he sent me the link. I watched Lego movies – I’d embed one here, but they don’t let you embed their movies (which is poor marketing, in my opinion). But here’s the link.

I like the episode where the prisoners escape by jumping into the prison toilet with scuba gear on. The prison administrators try to get the prisoners back using a toilet plunger. See screenshots.

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I think these videos would be extremely useful in an elementary language classroom, because there’s something salient about them – they’re produced without any dialogue whatsoever. Thus they could be used as prompts for story-writing, similarly to wordless comic-strips.

[Daily log: walking, 1 km]

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Caveat: Oh, THAT Man Came Around

Today is Buddha-Came-Along-Day (부처님 오신 날).  So, THAT man came around – as opposed to the other man who didn’t come around. A holiday. As is my usual behavior on most Korean holidays, I’m just going to stay home – I hate battling crowds in public transport, as everyone seems to want to go somewhere on holidays.

It matches up with U.S. Memorial Day, this year. That’s just coincidence – Buddha’s birthday follows the lunar calendar, and seems to fall kind of late, this year.

Now that I’ve renewed my contract, I’ve embarked on an apartment-improvement spree. I bought some soft mosquito-netting type stuff and I’ve rigged it over my window. The problem with this is that when the window is closed, the handle wants to push through where the netting wants to go. This has been solved because this netting is removable – it’s velcroed the window frame and when I want to close the window, I peel back the netting. It works. I’m happy – there are a lot of mosquitoes breeding in the swamp in the alley down below, and worse, there is a disgusting pigeon infestation on the side of my building somewhere, and they have a lot of flies, which fly through my open windows most discourteously. Now, problem solved – I can keep my window open without inviting in the small-brained denizens of the building’s exterior.

What I’m listening to right now.

The Arch, “Kafkaia.”

Caveat: GOEFL

Some Dalits in India are making a new "Goddess of English" according to something I saw at BBC. She's not a Goddess of English people, but English as a subject of study – because Dalits (who are India's "untouchable" caste) feel they need Engish even more than other Indian people. I think, actually, she should be called GOEFL – Goddess of English as a Foreign Language. This suits our language's current affinity for acronyms.

Wouldn't it be funny if, hundreds of years from now, anthropologists were trying to figure out how, exactly, GOEFL arose? I think if there's a Goddess, there needs to be some holy literature to go with her – I mean, seriously, if there was going to be a new "religion of the Book," this is the candidate. It should be a dictionary, maybe? Or a grammar textbook. That would be awesome.

I think the GOEFL could be serious candidate for FSM-type status. (FSM stands for Flying Spaghetti Monster.) I won't try to explain – but I recall the anecdote of the Kansas science teacher who tried to get the "FSM creation myth" into the classroom, based on challenging the vague wording of a new pro-creationist education law in that retrograde state. Properly, the religion is called Pastafarianism. I do not make this comparison this to mock GOEFL – I genuinely and sincerely hope she's a successful and widely adopted goddess.

To celebrate GOEFL Advent, I met my friend Basil who was up from Gwangju visiting, and we went out to that Indian Restaurant in the LaFesta shopping center (about a block from my old apartment). Actually, we didn't know it was GOEFL Advent. But we had some Naan and I had Aloo Palak and Raita, anyway. There were thunderstorms but the rain was sparse and we mostly walked between the raindrops.

What I'm listening to right now.

Cafe Tacuba, "Las Flores."

[Daily log: walking, 6 km]

Caveat: Superlinearity

It's probably not interesting to most people, but I find it fascinating: a scientist has decided that cities are different from anything else in the biological sphere (i.e. cities are, after all, collective organisms), because they experience "superlinear growth." Which is to say, cities grow faster as they grow bigger – whereas growth in every other biological system slows down as it gets bigger. What are the implications of this? Is this like comparing apples and oranges? Read a NYT article here, or another article by Stewart Brand here.

Caveat: The Man Didn’t Come Around

… but the song said he would. I’m referring to the Johnny Cash song based on the Book of Revelation (St John’s Apocalypsis). It’s rather dylanesque. Kind of intense in a not-sure-that’s-relevant way.

What I’m listening to right now.

Johnny Cash, “The Man Comes Around.”

Lyrics.

And I heard as it were the noise of thunder
One of the four beasts saying come and see and I saw
And behold a white horse

There’s a man going around taking names
And he decides who to free and who to blame
Everybody won’t be treated all the same
There’ll be a golden ladder reaching down
When the Man comes around

The hairs on your arm will stand up
At the terror in each sip and in each sup
Will you partake of that last offered cup?
Or disappear into the potter’s ground
When the Man comes around

Hear the trumpets, hear the pipers
One hundred million angels singing
Multitudes are marching to the big kettledrum
Voices calling, voices crying
Some are born and some are dying
It’s Alpha and Omega’s kingdom come

And the whirlwind is in the thorn tree
The virgins are all trimming their wicks
The whirlwind is in the thorn tree
It’s hard for thee to kick against the pricks

Till Armageddon no shalam, no shalom
Then the father hen will call his chickens home
The wise man will bow down before the throne
And at His feet they’ll cast their golden crowns
When the Man comes around

Whoever is unjust let him be unjust still
Whoever is righteous let him be righteous still
Whoever is filthy let him be filthy still
Listen to the words long written down
When the Man comes around

Hear the trumpets, hear the pipers
One hundred million angels singing
Multitudes are marching to the big kettledrum
Voices calling and voices crying
Some are born and some are dying
It’s Alpha and Omega’s kingdom come

And the whirlwind is in the thorn tree
The virgins are all trimming their wicks
The whirlwind is in the thorn tree
It’s hard for thee to kick against the pricks

In measured hundred weight and penney pound
When the Man comes around.

Close (Spoken part)
And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts
And I looked and behold, a pale horse
And his name that sat on him was Death
And Hell followed with him.

I heard this as I was walking around Ilsan earlier today – I went to the HomePlus store over by Kintex – it’s actually closer than the other one that’s near my old apartment. (HomePlus is a kind Korean Target store, roughly – it’s a step up from E-Mart which is Korean Wal-Mart, and, much as I prefer Target to Wal-Mart, so I also prefer HomePlus to E-Mart.)

I walked by the Juyeop Children’s Library, which is rather cool, architecturally.

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I walked by some springing flowers in front of Hansu Elementary School.

picture

It felt like early Summer. Wait – it’s early Summer. That must be why.

picture[Daily log: walking, 6 km]

Caveat: I Got Nothing

I went to one of my Korean tutoring sessions this morning, and then had a rather long day at work. And so now I feel tired. I got nothing.

What I'm listening to right now.

Snake River Conspiracy, "Vulcan."

[Daily log: walking, 5 km]

Caveat: Not So Complainy

When I posted yesterday that I had renewed for another year, several people commented to me in one medium or another that I seemed to be being a bit masochistic in doing this. That's not true at all. If you read this blog, of course there are some complaints about one thing or another. But I don't think there is an overall negativity to this blog. Is there?

The facts: this is the best job I've ever had. Even the best job has challenges, hard or frustating days, whatever. But teaching, in general, is the first career (of my dozen or so careers) where I end my day, on average, happier than I start it. So if I can combine that with a non-psychotic boss and being in a country and city and culture that I've grown to really like, if only as an outsider, and this makes for a pretty good job.

"The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe." – Albert Einstein.

Without being theistic, I definitely believe we live in a friendly universe. Call it a weird sort of "stealth" optimism.

[Daily log: walking, 4 km; running, 4 km]

Caveat: Radio K

Radio K is the University of Minnesota's radio station. They do things that I listen to, sometimes. The world is very interconnected these days, isn't it? I live in suburban Seoul and I listen to internet radio from Michoacan or Minnesota or Santa Monica.

What I'm listening to right now.

Fire in the Northern Firs, "Flavor Savior." The sound reminds me of something vaguely Afghan Wiggish or U2ish. Or something.

Caveat: Do It Again

It’s official. I signed my contract for another year in Korea, today – about 3 weeks after the renewal took effect from a de facto standpoint (the start date is May 1st), but such are things. We spent about an hour playing with our cellphones while waiting for our number to be called at the posh new Goyang City Immigration Office – our municipality finally has its own (as befits a city of over one million); the new office is near the city hall, instead of it just being a branch office of the Uijeongbu office, which is always what it’s been during my previous visits there.

As is usual in such moments, after the process was done I felt both giddy and yet at the same time gloomily reflective in a “buyer’s remorse” sort of way.

I’m happy that this stressful moment – the moment of decision and worry about if something might go wrong – is past, but I’m also wondering if I made the right decision. There are many things I don’t like about my position, some of which have, in fact, been highlighted this week – my lack of control over the curriculum is greater than I had hoped for, and I often feel that my strong opinions about students’ abilities and needs are essentially ignored. But… I have strong reasons to stay in Korea, and this provides a stable, safe, predictible environment in which to do so.

pictureIn good news, too, today, my student named Nemesis (not his real name, but you get the idea – picture at left) was extracted from my EP1 class, which made them a genuine pleasure for a change, despite their hyperactivity and disinterest in actual English. Ah well.

Teaching is such a strange thing to be claiming to be trying to do, isn’t it?

 

[Daily log: walking, 3 km; running, 2 km]

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Caveat: Rocinante

Walking home, I heard Nik Kershaw’s song “Don Quijote” come on my mp3 player’s shuffle. This made me think of Rocinante. But not the Rocinante who was Don Quijote’s horse, rather, the Rocinante that was the name of my giant M816 wrecker, US Army tow truck that I operated in Korea in 1991 as part of the 296th Support Battalion of the 2nd Infantry Division. In fact, I had nothing to do with why the truck was named Rocinante, although I approved of the name. It had simply come that way, already named.

Nik Kershaw’s album, The Riddle, which included that song, was one of only a half-dozen cassettes that I had for my Walkman, during my time stationed in Korea. As a consequence, the tape was on heavy rotation. When I was off duty, I would retreat from the barracks – where I despised some of my roommates, and most of all, where I genuinely feared my squad sergeant – and I would climb the hill on base to the helipad. I would sit down in a ditch and listen to my Walkman and read Dostoyevsky or Gogol. I consumed an immense amount of Russian literature that year – because the tiny Camp Edwards battalion library had a weirdly complete collection of Russian classics in translation. Perhaps this was a by-product of being so close to the DMZ (North Korea was less than 10 miles away), and an artifact of the Cold War era.

I don’t have any pictures from that epoch in my life. But here’s a “web pic” I found of an M816 tow truck. It’s a very useful tool for flipping over Humvees that have been stranded upside-down in rice fields by hotshot sergeants.

picture

What I’m listening to right now.

Nik Kershaw, “Don Quijote.” Lyrics:

your mind can play tricks
makes you what you want to be
just like superheroes
you saw them on tv

coast to coast, wall to wall
got to go, duty calls
here i am
superman, lois lane
saved the world, back again
here i am

in my old, red saloon
i’m a knight in shining armour
if i were asleep, man
i couldn’t be much calmer

hit the road, on the run
faster than anyone
here i amone for all, all for one
shake the fist, shoot the gun
here i am

don quixote
what do you say?
are we proud? are we brave?
or just crazy?
don quixote
what do you say?
are we shooting at windmills like you?

common sense, is as good
as a cafe’ on the moon
when man and machinery come to their high noon

beat the clock, punch the wall
fix’d in no time at all
here i amradio on the blink
kick the cat, hit the drink
here i am

don quixote
what do you say?
are we proud, are be brave
or just crazy?
don quixote
what do you say?
are we shooting at windmills like you?

here i am
don quixote
we’re all men of la mancha

[Daily log: walking, 4 km; running, 4 km]

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Caveat: Math

I was talking on the phone – “phone teaching” – with a 4th grader named Jiyun.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“I’m studying.”

“What are you studying?”

“Math,” she answered, laconically.

“Do you like math?” I asked, trying to draw her out.

“Nooo. No. I don’t like math.” She paused. “It’s’s a big problem. My mother is a math teacher,” she explained. Perfect English. Especially for a 4th grade elementary student. She’d made me laugh. I was impressed.

Speaking of math:

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[Daily log: walking, 5 km; running, 2 km]

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Caveat: pereat mundus, fiat philosophia, fiat philosophus, fiam!

I have been re-reading Nietzsche’s Geneology of Morals. I first read it maybe two decades ago in Spanish, but I consider it a very important work, for me. So I go back to it occasionally.

In his third essay, he writes about the ascetic ideal. I have felt the wierdly unascetic yearning to find this idea. I recognize the hypocrisy of it, as with most “purity narratives” as I like to call them. Here, Nietzsche rejects (or seems to be on the path to rejecting) Buddha’s ascetic idea, specifically.

pictureEvery philosopher would say, as Buddha said, when the birth of a son was announced to him: “Rahoula has been born to me, a fetter has been forged for me” (Rahoula means here “a little demon”); there must come an hour of reflection to every “free spirit” (granted that he has had previously an hour of thoughtlessness), just as one came once to the same Buddha: “Narrowly cramped,” he reflected, “is life in the house; it is a place of uncleanness; freedom is found in leaving the house.” Because he thought like this, he left the house. So many bridges to independence are shown in the ascetic ideal, that the philosopher cannot refrain from exultation and clapping of hands when he hears the history of all those resolute ones, who on one day uttered a nay to all servitude and went into some desert; even granting that they were only strong asses, and the absolute opposite of strong minds. What, then, does the ascetic ideal mean in a philosopher? This is my answer—it will have been guessed long ago: when he sees this ideal the philosopher smiles because he sees therein an optimum of the conditions of the highest and boldest intellectuality; he does not thereby deny ‘”existence,” he rather affirms thereby his existence and only his existence, and this perhaps to the point of not being far off the blasphemous wish, pereat mundus, fiat philosophia, fiat philosophus, fiam!

At the opening sentence of the next section (section 8), he makes his point explicitly. “These philosophers, you see, are by no means uncorrupted witnesses and judges of the value of the ascetic ideal.”

Indeed. These philosophers are, in fact, coopted by the purity meme. What’s the alternative?

What I’m listening to right now.

Röyksopp, “Vision One.”

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Caveat: Enough about Stella, Already!

I went to an accent-study survey (referenced from Language Log) in which many different speakers of English (mostly non native but with a few native speakers thrown in) read a passage – something about Stella shopping for peas and blue cheese and a toy frog. It gets kind of repetitive, and I concluded that the survey was badly designed. Here's the comment I posted at Language Log regarding my experience trying the survey.

I went through the survey fairly confidently, even naively, before reading these comments. And then I read Sarah Taub's: "I think my problem is that I wanted to interpret the study as asking how much the speakers sounded like native English speakers. I wish I had had more guidance from the experimenter as to how important the "native vs. non-native" and "US English vs. foreign" dimensions were. Perhaps those two dimensions should not have been combined in one experimental set."
Now I'm second-guessing myself. I really had no idea how to balance these two aspects, and I agree with her comment that they should have provided more guidance on separating the two dimensions: native vs non-native and American vs non-American. What I ended up doing was essentially rating them on strictly the native vs non-native dimension (because I've spent too much of my life outside the US, perhaps, to actually CARE about the US vs non-US dimension?). So I gave a lot of scores in the 4 to 6 range (as an ESL teacher I am perhaps too generous – if I can understand them then they don't sound THAT foreign – "foreign" is when you really actually can't even make out what they are talking about!). And then, if someone was a 6, I awarded a 7 to those who were unambiguously American-sounding to me – which was exactly two.

Despite my frustration with the survey, I have a nearly inexhaustible patience with and fascination for these types of things. I really should go back to graduate school, shouldn't I? In linguistics, I mean…

Caveat: Kuerajpiri

pictureSurfeaba un sitio de cultura y lengua p´urhépecha (idioma y pueblo de la región del estado de Michoacán en México, donde pasaba un medio año muy importante y formativo de mi juventud), y encontré esta leyenda sobre la creación del mundo.

De la primera gran explosión emergieron cuatro grandes rayos de luz, que se extendieron en cuatro direcciones distintas, en cuatro caminos con horizontes luminosos, dando lugar a los cuatro puntos cardinales. Nació así Tata-cuate y Nana-cuate principio dual, también llamado o llamada Kuerajpiri y le dio forma con sus manos de lumbre a un gran astro de luz y de calor; lo colocó en el centro de nuestro espacio y le dio la misión de alumbrar el universo. Le puso por nombre Tata-Juriata (Señor Sol) también llamado Kuri-kaueri.

Kuerajpiri (principio dual creador y destructor) decidió entonces darle una esposa a Tata-Juriata para que no estuviera tan solo, para que no se quedara fijo en el cielo, sobre un día eterno, sin contrastes ni movimiento. Le dio nacimiento a Nana-kutzi (Señora Luna). Pero él sólo aparecía de día y ella sólo de noche, de manera que estaban separados por el tiempo. De manera que decidieron verse alternativamente, una vez a la luz de él, otra vez a la luz brillante y redonda de ella. Y fue así como surgieron los eclipses de sol y de luna.

De esta unión nació Kuerahuaperi, también llamada Nana-Kuerari (nuestra madre tierra) que con el paso del tiempo se convirtió en una hermosa doncella. K’uri-kaueri se enamoró de ella. Le mandó cuatro rayos, que se posaron respectivamente en la frente, en el vientre, en la mano derecha y en la mano izquierda.

La doncella se convirtió en Nana-kuerari (la madre creadora), quien, en medio de una tempestad furiosa, dio a luz a las cosas naturales: la tierra seca, los montes, los ríos, los árboles, las flores, los lagos, los llanos, los vientos.

Tuvo luego un segundo parto, del cual nacieron todos los seres en movimiento, pero sin razón, sin emociones, sólo con instinto: los animales. Fue hasta el tercer parto que salieron a la luz los hombres y las mujeres, a los que dotó del saber, de manera que pudieran distinguir las cosas buenas de las malas. Se les dio el sonido y el habla para que se comunicaran entre sí.

Pero los hombres andaban errantes; no sabían medir el tiempo; no construían nada y peleaban entre sí. Nana-kuerari invocó a K’uri-kaueri y le pidió ayuda. El gran dios le entregó una caja de madera tallada. Le dijo que adentro estaban todas las cosas bellas que el hombre podía apreciar, y estaban también todos los oficios que podían aprender, y las líneas y los límites para organizar y medir el tiempo y el espacio. Pero también, le dijo, estaban los castigos, las maldades y la negrura del sufrimiento eterno. Debían usarla con sabiduría y sensatez.

De la caja también brotaron las estaciones del año. Los hombres aprendieron a construir casas, a cultivar la tierra, a transmitir conocimientos a las siguientes generaciones, a crear cultura y enriquecerla con el tiempo.

El sitio incluso tiene un streaming de una radiodifusora p´urhépecha. La escuchaba durante varias horas.

[Daily log: walking, 4 km]

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Caveat: 쥐구멍에도 볕들 날 있다

쥐구멍에도          볕들      날   있다
mouse-hole-IN-TOO sunshine day there-is
Even in a mouse hole there is sunshine.

This means, “Every dog has his day,” or “Every cloud has its silver lining.” I hope so. I had a crappy day. I’m looking for the silver lining. What’s with that EP1 class, anyway?

What I’m listening to right now.

Bush, “The Chemicals Between Us.” I’m killing time before falling asleep reading the Food section of the LA Times online. Why do I do this?

[Daily log: walking, 4 km; running, 2 km]

Caveat: Australopithecus?

pictureI said to my class, “Do you know the provinces of Korea?” I thought this would be an ‘gimme’ question – most Korean middle-schoolers know the provinces in their country. How wrong I was.

My student answered, enthusiastically, “Australopithecus!” There was no hesitation or doubt in his voice.

Perhaps he’d misunderstood my question. But what in the world did he think I’d meant? Or was it a joke? I never found out.

I’m really tired. Goodnight.

[Daily log: walking, 3 km]

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Caveat: I Think I’ve Been Doing It Wrong

Most of my friends and acquaintances know that I have these various “novels-in-progress.” Except that progress feels like a very strong word to apply to them – perhaps more accurately, they should be described as “novels-in-waiting.” I’m too good at procrastination.

A recent video I came across by Antoine Wilson (whose oeuvre I am utterly unfamiliar with) has caused me to question my methods. Here:

pictureIf you weren’t sure, I guess it’s a joke. I laughed really hard at this video, for quite a while. Relatedly, scrolling down on his blog/website a little, I find the following, in what appears to be a self-interview:

What is your motto?

Seize the daybed.

What self-respecting procrastinator couldn’t relate to that?

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Caveat: LEGO-원어민

picture“Teacher is so handsome,” said the 8th grade girl, with apparent sincerity.

I was somewhat taken aback. I sometimes get such effusive praise from younger students, or from old ladies in the subway – but almost never from self-respecting, well-adjusted teenagers. I tried to take it gracefully. Fortunately, she rescued me from my self-consciousness, by adding, “Your head is small. You are like a LEGO man.”

pictureThis could either be the kind of ironically meant “damning-with-faint-praise” remark typical of teens around the world, or it could be that this somewhat strange but cheerful girl was a fan of LEGO-people. I’d be happier to believe the latter. But who knows.

In the spirit of her complement (?), I drew the self-portrait above right on the blackboard at the close of class.

What I’m listening to right now.

Frank and Nancy Sinatra, “Something Stupid.”

[Daily log: walking, 5 km; running, 3 km]

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Caveat: forow iscrime

My student Jeonghyeon isn’t the most intellectual. The elementary third grader has a reputation for not ever even having mastered English phonics, for example. But today she gave me a picture – of a kangaroo eating “flower ice cream” that shows clear evidence of having understood the principles of phonics – look how she’s decided to spell out her title, at the top: “forow iscrime.” This shows some awareness, at least, of how English phonics works – it’s not just a random agglomeration of letters, which I’ve known some students at her level of ability (including her, in the past) to do with any vocabulary they haven’t memorized.

picture

pictureToday was “Teacher’s Day.” I’m not sure what this day is supposed to be for – unlike children during “Children’s Day,” teachers on Teacher’s Day don’t get the day off and no one takes them to the park. But I did get a few stray gifts from well-meaning students (or perhaps from the kids of well-meaning parents), including this pink box of Japanese sweets (well, I assume they’re either Japanese or Japanese-style, since there’s Japanese on the label).

[Daily log: walking, 3 km; running, 4 km]

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Caveat: Diarios de Corea

I’ve been trying to read a book. It’s called Diarios de Corea, by the Argentinian (or is he a Spaniard? I can’t quite figure it out) journalist Bruno Galindo (I was unable to figure out if there’s an English translation available – a cursory search online seems to suggest there isn’t). I thought it would be interesting to get a non-Anglosphere perspective on Korea, but so far, I don’t much like the book. I’m reading it in my usual non-linear fashion. I’ve read maybe 15% of it, skipping back and forth between the two parts – it’s divided into a section on the North and a section on the South, the author having spent time on both sides.

pictureI suppose I can’t criticize the part on the North – I know next to nothing about the North. But his sections on the South, there is a sort of vaguely gonzo myopia (is there such a thing as gonzo myopia? Of course – perhaps that’s the point?) which can be summed up with a simple declaration, on my part: “Itaewon is not Korea, nor is it an accurate cross-section of Korea.” For those who don’t know, Itaewon is Seoul’s historically “foreign” neighborhood. It’s a zone of immigrants, of off-duty US soldiers, of hustlers and bars, of prostitutes and gray-market wholesalers, and of numerous excellent shops selling international goods. But Itaewon is hardly an accurate picture of Korea, or South Korea, or Seoul, or Korean culture, or anything at all. And Galindo’s diary, at least what I’ve seen of it so far, seems to consist largely of encounters with various Itaewonites, supplemented by extractions from the yellowest of the Korean English-Language press (which is mostly yellow).

Imagine if a foreigner came to the U.S., and stayed at a hotel on Canal Street in New York City, and then went off to write a “perspective on the U.S.” type book. Would it be an accurate picture of the U.S.? Would it even be an accurate picture of lower Manhattan?

I hate to leap to judgment. I’ll keep reading the book. But his misapprehensions with respect to the South cause me to distrust what would otherwise be fascinating portrayals of life in the North. How accurate is it, really?

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Caveat: Contradictory Advice

First…

“Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education alone will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.” – Calvin Coolidge.

…(And allegedly mentioned by Hunter S. Thompson as having appeared in a McDonalds, and found in various other places on the internet.)  I like the quote – it’s very Korean, though. And for someone like me, who lacks the quality in question – persistence – it’s a bit depressing.

Secondly, and in utter contradiction to the first…

picture

This is more in line with my character. And if the first is Korean-sounding, the latter matches up quite well with Korean behavior. Perhaps this isn’t coincidence?

Unrelatedly, a conversation with a Korean friend:

“You don’t like to sing?” he said.

“You don’t like to dance?” he continued.

“You don’t like to drink? What do you like, then?”

“If I liked to drink,” I answered, carefully, “the other things would follow.”

“Yes. That is the key.”

[Daily log: walking, 4 km; running, 2 km]

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Caveat: 나혼자

What I’m listening to right now.

씨스타 [Sistar], “나혼자” [I’m Alone]. Kpop-in-Vegas – looks like.

가사:

pictureWhoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (I don’t wanna cry)
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (Please dry my eyes)
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (I’m fallin’ down)
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (Without you I’m fallin’ down)

추억이 이리 많을까 넌 대체 뭐할까 아직 난 이래 혹시 돌아 올까 봐
나 절대 이런 애 아닌데 이런 적 없었는데 사랑 너무도 독해 아직도 못 깼나 봐

너무도 달콤한 니 말에 속아 이제와 혼자
I’m falling down I’m falling down
차라리 만나지 말걸 그랬어 이렇게 될 줄 몰랐어
이토록 쉽게 우린 끝인가요

왜 또 나 혼자 밥을 먹고 나 혼자 영화를 보고
나 혼자 노래하고 이렇게 나 울고 불고 넌 떠나고 없어 후회해도 소용없어
오늘도 나 혼자
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo

나 혼자 길을 걷고 나 혼자 TV를 보고
나 혼자 취해 보고 이렇게 매일 울고 불고
사랑 참 달콤했어 이별이란 그림자 안에서
오늘도 잠 못자
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo

Don’t tell me it’s over
날 안아줘 도대체 내게 넌 왜 이러는데
Oh Ma boy (Whoo Whoo Whoo)
오늘도 나 눈물로 지새워

너무도 달콤한 니 말에 속아 이제와 혼자
I’m falling down I’m falling down
차라리 만나지 말걸 그랬어 이렇게 될 줄 몰랐어
이토록 쉽게 우린 끝인가요

왜 또 나 혼자 밥을 먹고 나 혼자 영화를 보고
나 혼자 노래하고 이렇게 나 울고 불고 넌 떠나고 없어 후회해도 소용없어
오늘도 나 혼자
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo

나 혼자 길을 걷고 나 혼자 TV를 보고
나 혼자 취해 보고 이렇게 매일 울고 불고
사랑 참 달콤했어 이별이란 그림자 안에서
오늘도 잠 못자
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo

참 뻔하디 뻔한 너의 그런 빈번한 거짓말에 또 속았어
아주 값싼 니 미소에 홀린 날 갖고 너 재미있게 놀았어
이제와서 뭘 어쩌겠어 그리움에 갇혀 나 혼자서
니가 버린 내 맘 공허해 꼭 버려져 텅빈 거리 같아

Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (I don’t wanna cry)
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (Please dry my eyes)
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (I’m fallin’ down)
Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo (Without you I’m fallin’ down)

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Caveat: When in Doubt, Make Coleslaw

"When in doubt, do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest." – Mark Twain (frequently quoted by Harry Truman).

After work this morning I went grocery shopping. I bought some celery, carrots and purple cabbage and ended up making a really delicious coleslaw for myself – I still have no idea why it is I sometimes get cravings for coleslaw. I tend to "invent" my own coleslaw recipe each time I get these cravings – I never follow a recipe of any kind. Starting with the cabbage, carrot and celery, I added some chopped apple, some "craisins" (dried cranberries), some chopped almonds I had lying around. I used yoghurt as the liquid element and some spices (nutmeg, mint-leaf, pepper), and it turned out very deliciously.

I still have no signed renewal contract. We're waiting on some paperwork, but we're going to end up cutting a fine line as far as my current visa's expiration date (2 more weeks left on it) – that always makes me nervous. But Korea is the land-of-the-last-minute-bureaucracy. Hopefully, all will work out fine. I've felt like my teaching is going well, lately, I've had some great classes with the middle-schoolers – it's odd how when I started at Karma, I felt like I was sacrificing a great deal by teaching the middle-schoolers as well as the elementary-age students, but over this last year I've grown to really enjoy the older kids as well – they're advanced enough (well, some of them) where conversations are actually possible, but young enough to still be at least mildly curious about the world around them.

[Daily log: walking, 4 km]

Caveat: Larva on the Bus

That’s not really what it sounds like.

pictureI was riding the bus yesterday morning to go meet one of my Korean tutors.

On the bus they have these TVs that display route information, advertising, weather, and occasional “features.” The feature I saw was a silly cartoon about some larvae that live in a storm drain. When I got home I decided to try to find these larvae on the internet. I did.

I couldn’t find the specific episode I saw, which involved a man dropping a ring into the storm drain and reaching down to retrieve it, and the subsequent epic battle between the disembodied hand and the larvae who live there. But I found the episode below, which involves a massive amount of prehensile snot.

라바 [raba = larva], “콧물” [kongmul = snot].

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Caveat: Unverifiable

picture“The problem with quotes on the Internet is that it is hard to verify their authenticity.” – Abraham Lincoln.

Haha. Huh.

 

What I’m listening to right now.

Seeed, “Wonderful Life.” I came for the video. Stayed for the song.

[Daily log: walking, 3 km]

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Caveat: mensaje de un pueblo libre y soberano

Uno de los conjuntos musicales mexicanos que más me gusta es Molotov – a pesar de su preocupación por temática de drogas y violencia, también muestran una clara inteligencia política y cultural. Surfeaba teh youtubes pa encontrar algunos buenos tracks. Éste siguiente me tiene una resonancia – tan lírica como políticamente, ofrece mucho. 

Lo que estoy escuchando ahora mismo.

pictureMolotov, “Gimme Tha Power.”

Cuando era chico quería ser como superman
pero ahora ya quiero ser un diputado del PAN
o del PRI o del PRD
o cualquier cosa que tenga un poco de poder
quiero convertirme en músico político
y construirle un piso al periferico
quiero acabar con el tráfico
tengo que entrar en la historia de México
y luego miro al pecero que va medio pedo
jugando carreras con los pasajeros
pero el tiene que pasar primero
sin luces sin frenos junto al patrullero
aunque no sepa leer
no sepa hablar
el es el que te brinda la seguridad
asi lo tienes que respetar
porque el representa nuestra autoridad

(Coro)
So you think you goona hit me
but now We gonna hit you back

Te metera en el bolsillo una sustancia ilegal
y te va a consignar al poder judicial
y ahí seguro que te ira muy mal
porque te haran cocowash con agua mineral
porque en ti creiamos todos los mexicanos
te dimos trabajo pagado y honrado
te dimos un arma para cuidarnos
y el arma que usas la usas para robarnos
y aunque quieras quejarte con papa gobierno
les pides ayuda y te mandan al infierno
porque tendremos que tirar buen pedo
solo te van a dar atole con el dedo
y en la fila del departamento de quejas
toparas con un mar de secretarias pendejas
el siguiente en la fila y asi te la pelas
pero algunos al final nunca se traspapela

(Coro)

México solidario acabo a los tiranos
sin la necesidad de ensuciarnos las manos
no podemos pedir resultado inmediato
de un legado de 75 años
todos unidos pedimos un cambio
piedra sobre piedra y peldaño a peldaño
solo poder expresarnos es palaba de honor
de nuestro jefe de estado
te arrepentiras de todo lo que trabajas
se te ira la mitad de todo lo que tu ganas
manteniendo los puestos de copias piratas
que no pagan impuestos pero son más baratas
veo una fuerte campaña de tele y de radio
promoviendo la union entre los ciudadanos
mensaje de un pueblo libre y soberano
IGUAL QUE TU MOLOTOV TAMBIEN ES MEXICANO!!!!!

(Nos quieren pegar pegar)
So you think you gonna hit me
(y nos la van a pagar)
but now we gonna hit you back

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Caveat: Raw Rats


Wow, sagas!

Solo’s deed, civic deed.
Eye dewed, a doom-mood.
A pop …
Sis sees redder rotator.
Radar eye sees racecar X.
Dad did rotor gig.
Level sees reviver!
Solo’s deified!
Solo’s reviver sees level …
Gig rotor did dad!
X, racecar, sees eye.
Radar rotator, redder, sees sis …
Pop a doom-mood!
A dewed eye.
Deed, civic deed.
Solo’s sagas: wow.

"The text is a palindrome by Nick Montfort that briefly retells 'Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope,' making Han Solo central. The palindrome is a revised version of the one Montfort wrote in 75 minutes for the First World Palindrome Championship, held in Brooklyn on March 16, 2012." – Posted at a site called Machine Libertine.

I love palindromes.

What I'm listening to right now.

Japanese Pop Stars, "Let go." The video is pretty cool. I had some tricolor penne with pesto and broccoli for dinner. I'm feeling tired – this new (old) exercise habit I'm trying to re-start is kind of … tiring.

[Daily log: walking, 4 km; running, 4 km]

Caveat: Not So Difficult

We were talking in one of my classes about their mid-term test scores at the public school, in their various subjects – not just English. Then later, I was asking them about their “dreams” – as in their lifetime ambitions. The following conversation took place (with some minor omissions for coherence).

I asked one student, “What is your dream?”

“I need money. A lot of money,” he answered. This is typical for 8th graders. And Koreans. And Korean 8th graders.

“That’s not so easy,” I reflected. “How will you get a lot of money?”

He shrugged.

“That’s difficult,” a second student offered.

The first student said, brightly, “I got very lowest score in 도덕.” [도덕 (do-deok) is mandatory ethics class, in Korean public schools.] This seemed rather cynical, or else it was a clever joke.

He thought for a minute, and the discussion moved to other students’ dreams. But then the first student interruped. “My dream. I want to be a father.”

The room was quiet for a moment. The second student said, “Oh! That’s not so difficult.”

The girls in the back of the room giggled. I decided to change the subject.

I went jogging in the park by the lake tonight, after work, under a rising bloody orange gibbous moon. I love to be in the park at exactly 11 pm, when they shut off the outdoor lights. It’s still plenty light enough to see – the city is all around. And they don’t close the park – people are still around. But it’s suddenly much, much darker. It’s like a sudden chord change in some dramatic music. The feel of it changes.

What I’m listening to right now.

Gus Gus, “Starlovers.” Very weird, kind of groovy song. Creepy video. [UPDATE: the creepy video linkrotted into nothingness, but the audio track is restored via a replaced youtube link.]

An utterly unrelated, random picture from my archive, just for whatever. Xalapa, Veracruz, Mexico, 2007.

picture

[Daily log: walking, 5 km; running, 3 km]

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Caveat: Frog, Hen, Cow, Snake

I recently ran across a website that agrees with my theories about the importance of “art” in language teaching. I mean, it’s not a deeply academic site, but it’s nice to see teachers that have the same instinct and approach that I do. Creativity is how to get kids (and even adults) to not just study but to actually learn to use foreign language. Anyway. In that vein, here’s a really good drawing done by an otherwise low-ability and low-motivation fifth-grade student named Ahyeon, based on a story we read about Boe the Frog, who counts feet (as in: “that hen has 2 feet, one, two”; etc.).

picture

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Caveat: Redemption From Piracy @ 99¢ a pop

Haha. I did something, today, that I haven’t done in about a year: I paid for music. I was listening to KCRW, and there was a track I liked. Normally, I respond to this by doing a youtube search for a posting of the track, and then I use a little conversion utility to grab an mp3 file of the audio part of the video – no questions asked. This is piracy, of course.

I have rationalized this behavior (or justified it, or something) with the excuse that, since having come to Korea, I have continuously run into problems which can be summed up by this paraphrase: “Sorry, [this music-selling website, e.g. amazon etc.] is not authorized to sell this material in your country.” After a few encounters with this type of barrier, I gave up, and became a pirate. It was too easy, not to.

But today, I couldn’t find this track in the youtubes, and so I clicked the “buy in amazon” link in the KCRW track-list; just for giggles, I went ahead and attempted the transaction, and lo and behold, it went through, despite my nefarious Asian IP address.

Damn! I might have to give up piracy. Amazon wants my money, and my poor citizenship in the capitalist machine just lost its backing logic. Ah, redemption.

picture
What I’m listening to right now.

[So I couldn’t find a youtube of it, right? You can get it for $0.99 on amazon.com]

The Baldwin Brothers, “That’s Right.”

[Daily log: walking, 4 km; running 4 km]

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Caveat: All Your Bad Englishes Are Belong to Us

Actually, I LOVE bad Englishes. As a descriptive linguist, I don't feel any need to correct them, when they memify. Rather, I feel a strong temptation to encourage their proliferation – because it's like I want to encourage linguistic diversity and language change. Well, anyway, there was a posting at Language Log about the "All Your Base" meme, and I was thinking about it.

What I'm listening to right now.

All Your Base Are Belong To Us – Youtube fan-techno, or something. Right. 물론!

Relatedly, while surfing the decrepit and latent links of LanguageLogLand, I ran across the most romantic nerd-poem EVER:

roses are #FF0000
violets are #0000FF
all my base
are belong to you

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