Caveat: Memory; Anticipation; Experience

It is official that I will be traveling to Australia to visit my mother for the first week in September. I have worked out a replacement teacher for my job, and I've bought the airline tickets and the rental car.

Last year, I traveled to the US in November, so, in returning to my pre-cancer pattern, this year is Australia's "turn." 

As is my new base state, I'm not necessarily "excited" by the prospect of travel. I don't seem to derive much pleasure from traveling, as I used to. Nevertheless, I am looking forward to seeing my mom.

Traveling is a bit like eating, maybe. I have so many fond memories of travel, and I have these fantasies and "cravings." With food, due to my loss of taste and swallowing facility from the surgery, I always end up disappointed and frustrated when I actually eat something I remember enjoying once-upon-a-time. Likewise, the actual experience of travel is inevitably disappointing: stressful and tedious. Unlike with eating, however, it's not clear to me how this new progression of events developed.

I'm sure it will be OK, though. 

More later.

[daily log: walking, 6.5km]

 

 

Caveat: Random Poem #73

(Poem #374 on new numbering scheme)

Today I walked more slowly than I do
more typically. I trudged instead of walked.
I can't say why this was. Perhaps I'm tired
from long hot days, or maybe full of angst.
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