caveat: not for claustrophobics

i went to my “practice” radiation session today. they tested their gadgets on me but also prepared my restraint system. a set of customized plastic molds were prepared shaped to my head and torso.

when strapped down inside them, i have zero freedom of movement. ZERO. i can only breathe. i cant twitch. i cant open my eyes. i cant turn my neck even a millimeter. i cant swallow or flex my tongue.

just breathe.

machines hum. the automated table moves me in and out of the ring-o-xray-zappers. doctors and technicians talk.

breathe in. breathe out. my training in meditation is the most useful skill ive ever acquired.

when they unstrapped me the doctor grinned. “you passed. you got your license.” he said i did perfect.

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One comment

  1. Wendy Miller

    Wow…hope I never have to do that! I twitch and move my arms, legs, fingers, SOME part of my body at all times, even when asleep. Staying that still, requires a discipline that I have never been able to master. Congratulations!

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