Caveat: …and no matter what, don’t think about elephants

Another excellent comic from “pictures for sad children.”

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Now, take the concept above, please, and invert it. Sorta. Make it something wonderful, something positive, that you’re not supposed allow to change your behavior. It’s not a bomb – it’s the potential loss of nirvana.

I have a weird theory that this is how enlightenment works. Or salvation. Or grace. It’s something that changes everything, but you’re not really supposed to change what you do – because it’s what you’ve been doing, that brought it on.

… and no matter what, don’t think about elephants, either.

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Caveat: Never doing anything

“I don’t know why you want to live in the city.  You never do anything.” This is what my friend (and now boss), Mun-chan said to me, once, when I was telling him about the trials and tribulations of my life in exile down south.

And.  He’s right.  Now that I’m back… I don’t do much.  I sometimes develop a plan to do something, but then, I don’t do it. Yesterday, it was raining, and I lost my motivation to go out and about.  So, what’s the point of life “in the city”? I like the accessibility of things. And, I’ve come firmly to believe that urban life – especially high-density urban life – is actually a lower-impact, higher-sustainability type of lifestyle. That means something to me, I guess.

pictureOn that note, I found the most awesome webcomic (called “pictures for sad children” [NOTE: The original comic is offline, but is archived by US Library of Congress]), while surfing, earlier. And this little two-frame (at right) really puts the idea animal rights and veganism related movements in perspective. It’s totally accurate – the things we do in “building and maintaining” our civilization has just as much impact on animals’ lives as our specifically food-producing activities – and on a much broader range of species, too, I’m sure. I’m not meaning to turn this into a rant – it’s just a funny, thoughtful little comic.

So I guess I’ll get back to not doing anything.

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Caveat: Right now is sometime!

picture“Me get it, cookie is sometimes food. You know what? Right now is sometime!” – Cookie Monster, after a lecture by some other character, urging moderation.

I miss Cookie Monster. And I love surfing the tvtropes.org website. I can find quotes like that, and spend hours and hours surfing a deeply ironical, often very well-written (mostly by vaguely anonymous volunteers a la the wikithing), pop-culture semiotician’s paradise.

It claims, “This wiki is a catalog of the tricks of the trade for writing fiction.” No, it’s not that – it’s much more. It’s a tool for navigating pop culture, and a database of semiotic trivia. I can’t recommend it more highly.

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Caveat: Thank the Nerds

My take on the Japanese quake:  good engineering has saved tens of thousands of lives.  Just compare the event in Haiti, last year, to this event.  And we can watch the well-engineered buildings swaying, not collapsing, in this cool video:

Most of the deaths in Japan have been from tsunami flooding, not collapsing things.  A huge evolution from the Kobe quake only 15 years ago, in 1995.    Other bloggers have observed that this quake – having been so huge and yet having such a limited death toll (not to minimize this in any way) – is proof that the worst "natural disasters" are also social disasters – failures of the social contract.

It is perhaps early to be triumphalist on behalf of engineers:  they're still struggling with their abundance of nuclear power plants – and it's easy for me to imagine things could go horribly wrong, there.  Certainly, if Korea were an earthquake-prone country (which it's not), I'd have much more ambivalent feelings about living 5 km from one of the largest nuclear facilities in the world.

Caveat: Stormtroopers

pictureI’ve been surfing a lot of visual arts and graphic design sites and blogs. One I found recently is called “love all this,” and there I found a link to a person who took 365 photos of star wars stormtrooper figurines (one a day for a year) and posted them to flickr. I began surfing through the pictures, and found myself inexplicably moved to laughter but also even poignancy and pathos.

Like any good visual narrative, it’s easy to “read between the lines” in the characters’ actions and postures, deducing feelings and mental states that obviously aren’t really there (since they’re just plastic toy figurines, after all). I found the whole thing genuinely compelling.

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Caveat: tweegret, NSFW version

My third twinge of tweegret, today.  Rather than try to explain, read this article. Seriously.

Normally I try to stay away from the vast internet realms characterized by the charming label “NSFW.” But @MayorEmannuel is a new masterpiece, apparently: Literature meets Politics meets Cultural Crit meets NSFW Obscenity. And Madrigal’s article about it is brilliant!

And no, I still have no twitter account.
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Caveat: Cyclone Yasi… and meanwhile in NZ…

My mother survived Cyclone Yasi’s attack on Queensland. I guess I just missed it, eh? I was very worried when I heard that the town of Tully was “utterly destroyed” on New Zealand Radio. You see, she lives just off of Tully Falls Road. I know the town of Tully is about 60 km away from her house outside of Ravenshoe as the raven flies, but that’s still pretty close.

On the Australian Courier-Mail (newspaper) website, I saw the following picture of Tully, for example. More on the article, here.

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My mother’s email notifying family and friends of her survival is worth reproducing as a sort of first-hand account of the experience – so here it is:

But definitely don’t want to repeat the experience, EVER AGAIN. However, very lucky…house intact, simply have a completely new skyline to the north. Two huge trees down with parts of them about 2 meters from house. One is iron bark so will have plenty of firewood for foreseeable future.

Phone will probably go out sometime today, so want to send this to reassure all. Probably without power for a long time to come. Heard from Debbie (Gary’s wife). They survived in Charters Towers with category 3, and hope to be back tomorrow–something I doubt will occur if the Burdekin is up which the continuing rain will probably ensure.

I endured 5 hours of category 5 and likening it to a huge freight train barrelling through house is as close as I can get to a comparison. I was SCARED and huddled down in hallway–only narrow panels on back door to threaten with glass. Huge thumps in night…will have to check out roof once it dies down some more. “Torrential” rains is not an exaggeration for present condition of weather. Wallabies and butcher birds pretty pathetic at present. Will probably run out of power on computer and my iPod speakers, boo, hiss. But can run the earphones if so inclined/bored. Will be sleeping today!!! Not a wink before it quietened down around 4:45 AM, and only 7:45 at present.

Ben stopped by and helped me set up my old camp propane bottle/burner. It works–we extracted it from my little shed under house. He says there are heaps of trees down on their property–more on the old creek flat than on the hill. But it sure looks bright with all the tops off the trees.  It’s going to be a long clean up, but he said he’d get around to getting the two-three trees down on drive off sometime in next couple of days. I’m cool for two days as long as I stay out of freezers and fridge. A lot of meat that needs to be cooked, but not sure when I’ll be able to get to it. May start giving it away.

Enough for now. I’ll see if I have an internet set up. It goes through Cairns and they didn’t suffer like Innisfal and Tully and Mission Beach. Feeling pretty lousy, nauseated from exhaustion.  Could almost feel you all wishing me well. Much love, and, despite gloom of rearranged skyline (a lot of my natives gone–mostly lovely grey-green wattles), laughter and a feeling of being both lucky and blessed. Will be in touch when things get back to normal, or a semblance thereof.

Meanwhile, here in NZ (EnZed, pronounced locally as we yanks would pronounce “InZid”)… it was Southern California-like weather, as I re-crossed the Cook Strait back to Wellington, and began my drive back up to Auckland this afternoon. Here are some pictures from today.

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Caveat: Someone Ranting Intelligently about Typography

I really like this super intelligent, well-argued rant about someone else's rant about the principle of double-space versus single-space between sentences in a single paragraph.  I don't actually care, one way or the other, but I love that someone can argue the points so cogently, tearing apart another's poor arguments.

Fonts and typography fascinate my, but I'm unable, for the most part, of forming strong opinions on their aesthetics.  I'm perhaps more strongly opinionated in the realms of usage or orthography – in a scathingly anti-prescriptivist direction. 

Not sure what my point is, in this post, except to reveal that I think about these things way too much – aren't there better things to do with one's brain?

Caveat: tweegret 2.0

tweegret. N.  the feeling that one gets that one might be missing out, by not participating in what seems to be a largely vacuous fad called Twitter.

I felt my second twinge of tweegret, this morning, upon learning that the [US] National Christmas Tree has its own twitter account, this year (#trackthetree). Thank you, Stephen Colbert, for elucidating this matter so cogently.
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Caveat: … the vast Libyan dessert

… or, catching the internet with its pants down.

It’s pretty hard to capture the ephemerality of hilarious spelling mistakes and typos on well-maintained websites. But I did it. And with only a little bit of guilt, I post the result here. I mean no disrespect to Max Fisher of The Atlantic, where I found the error – in this age of automatic spell checking, errors of this sort are easily made and missed – I’m guilty of much worse ones, myself. But I do find a delicious irony in the specific error made, given that he used to be a food writer.

So having said that, the absolute best part of his article about last year’s secret nuclear standoff between the US, Russia and Libya was the serendiptous typo that allowed him to write, “U.S. officials worried about the security of the casks. It would have been easy for anyone with a gun and a truck to drive up, overpower the guard, use the crane to load the casks onto the truck, and drive off into the vast Libyan dessert.”

I so enjoyed the poetic image of a gang of terrorists driving truckloads of enriched uranium around a Candylandified Sahara.

Sadly, the error was very rapidly corrected. In the time I took to write this post, the delightful dessert was Orwellianly transmogrified into a workaday desert. But I had the amazing fortuity to have done the page “refresh” in a different window, and hadn’t closed the original.  Consequently, I am able to present, with great pride, exceedingly rare “before and after” screenshots of the error in question, below. [Click thru images to view original full size]

Before:

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After:

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Caveat: What Happens When Low English Ability Joins The Marketing Department

pictureThis happens all the time, in Korea – and the rest of non-English-speaking world, too, for that matter. Some product gets developed and marketed under a name that would be an utter disaster in an English-speaking market. If not a downright embarrassment. But this guy (an American in Korea) has made a funny video about a particular example of this phenomenon.


[hat tip: my friend Basil]

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Caveat: El Desafío

Hace 16 años estuve en Patagonia. Recientemente (re)encontré en el web un lugar que recuerdo muy vivamente: El Desafío es una especie de “folk art” que se ubica en el pueblo de Gaiman en el valle del río de Chubut. Un parque construido completamente de materiales reciclados: ladrillos, botellas de vidrio y plástico, autos rotos, toneladas de basura. De hecho, resulta en una clase de “theme park.” Algún día, gustaría regresar al valle de Chubut, con sus raices en las culturas galesa e italiana, su belleza desolada; es uno de mis lugares favoritos en Sudamérica.

“Un desafío a la solemnidad, a la falta de amor, a la inercia, a la incapacidad. Un canto a la vida, al optimismo, al humor, a la creatividad.”

Parque-el-desafio

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Caveat: X

Not a perfect man.  But a truly great American:  liberty and justice for all – "By any means necessary."

Malcolm X. Oxford Union Debate, Dec. 3 1964 from Jason Patterson on Vimeo.

I saw this video posted on Ta-Nehisi Coates' blog.  Some commenters remarked on the parallelism between X's rhetoric and the neo-constitutionalist talk of tea-party types.  One commenter, however, made the difference quite clear, and stated it eloquently and simply:

There's such a thing as a right to rebellion, and the rhetoric of revolution is always at hand as a tool. But the right to rebellion requires that your rebellion be right.

Caveat: Let us go and post an entry

More internet zaniness, from someone called copperbadge.  Really quite impressive – a commenter said:  "You've given Love Song a modern voice, for the intarweb generation, but the sentiment seems the same.

I will reproduce the first stanza here:

THE .DOC FILE OF J ALFRED PRUFROCK
with deepest apologies to T.S. Eliot

Let us go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out against the sky
Like a laptop, put in sleep mode on a table
Let us go through certain half-deserted streets
The blinking-light retreats
Of restless nights in free-wifi cafes
And public libraries with internet
Streets that follow like messageboard argument
of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming blog post
Oh, do not ask, "What, yaoi?"
Let us go and post an entry.

In the room the players come and go
Talking of their scores on Halo.

Caveat: The Wilderness Downtown

"The Wilderness Downtown" is an experimental music "video" written using HTML5 by googloids.  It's pretty cool – you need Chrome to view it.  You put in your home address, and it uses footage from Google Earth and Street View to incorporate your actual house into the video, dynamically.  I can't decide if this is creepy or awesome.  Call it crawesome.

I put in my childhood home, in Arcata, and saw the very recognizable dead-end street with Peggy and Latif's cars in the driveway (Peggy and Latif being the current residents of the house where I grew up).  And there were some animated trees marching up 11th street.  Very strange.

The music is by Arcade Fire.  Not too bad.  The technical implementation of the video – which calls up large numbers of windows in a rather random way – is deficient in that it fails to deal very well with the small, non-standard-size screen of my Asus netbook computer.  The windows all hide each other and you can't see more than half of the ones it calls up.  The code would have to somehow do better at reading the display size and used scaled-down, lower resolution windows depending on what it found, maybe.

Caveat: If it weren’t for that ad…

I had an American friend, Peter, who worked in Ilsan.  He's back in the US, now, but one time when I was hanging out with him and the TV was on, and this commercial came on.  One of those ubiquitous, twitchy, obnoxious TV commercials.  Peter and I had been talking, rather seriously, about the positives and negatives of "life in Korea," and when that ad came on, Peter said, in a wry tone, "If it weren't for that ad, I would love this country."

That ad still comes on the TV all the time, half a year later.  And it came on, and I remembered Peter's joke, and laughed.  And just to give everyone a taste of something small and irrelevant but absolutely, undeniably a part of "life in Korea," here is that ad.  Enjoy!  Or throw things at me!  Whichever.

I think 원캐싱 (won-kae-sing i.e. "won cashing") is a check-cashing or salary-advance type service.  As if you could tell from the ad – although note the exhorbitant interest rate that flashes up in the fine print at one point.

Caveat: Somebody loves Morgan Freeman a lot more than I do

That somebody is Yellow Ostrich.  Plus, I like his music marketing strategy:  pay what you think it’s worth.  Embedded, a video of one of the tracks of his Morgan Freeman EP (“Inspired by Morgan Freeman’s wikipedia page.”).  Brilliant.  And here’s a review. A commenter muses, “this is post-irony, I thnk.” Uh-huh-yeh. Thanks to Chris Bodenner, guest-blogging for Andrew Sullivan at The Atlantic, for pointing to this.

Yellow Ostrich – Morgan Freeman’s Early Life from Panaframe on Vimeo.

Caveat: Quack

I am listening to A Prairie Home Companion, Saturday night broadcast on MPR (which I listen to at 8 AM Sunday, over here west of the date line).  There's a skit retelling of "The Ugly Duckling."  Lots of good duck puns.  The best:  "All these duck doctors are quacks if you ask me."

Caveat: Knees, Toes and Monkeys

I have been discovering how much fun the younger students have with “TPR songs” – “TPR” is an acronym for “total physical response” which is a rather grandiosely-named language-teaching methodology which basically means “have kids move around because it activates their learning.”  I’ve always been a believer in this – although I was always personally a very visual learner, I know there are kids who learn better when material is connected to movement (kinesthetic learners).  So TPR songs just means songs where there are physical actions that the kids can do. 

I’ve been going out into youtubeland and finding good videos to show the kids.  Some are more successful than others.  Here are two that have been by far the two most popular so far.  I have that CJ version of “5 little monkeys” stuck in my head, and the every time I see a first grader now, she or he will say “teacher!  knees and toes!”

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