I'm just feeling very frustrated about my progress with Korean. I feel like no matter what I do, I can't seem to remember essential vocabulary. And I say the same things, over and over, to clerks in convenience stores or to the manager at the guesthouse, and I'm never understood.
Gazes of incomprehension.
And people say things I should understand, and I just stare, with the thought, I should be understanding this, but I can't. I dream in Korean, sometimes, but it's always that specific type of Korean that I can't understand at all… it's just dreaming in confusing babble. So dreaming in a language isn't a guarantee of progress, after all.
At moments like this, my resolve to stay and try to learn this language wavers dangerously, and I think, oh, hell, I'll just go back to the US and do something else. I feel intimidated by the job search, depressed by my lack of progress in the language, unimpressed with my lack of diligence in the tasks that I set for myself. I'm feeling too old, insufficiently competent.
OK… so here I am, venting my despondency in this very open forum. Maybe, it's just springtime blues? Well… "아자아자!"