Yesterday I went to the Meiji Shrine, among other places. It's kind of a big almost wilderness-y park just a few km south of Shinjuku. Quite stunning and beautiful inside. I took some video… maybe I'll try to process and post it, later.
Anyway, when I first got there (after walking the wrong way around to the "back" entrance, as per my obtuse, instinctive, anti-touristic custom), I found myself having a short exchange with the guard at the entrance, since there didn't appear to be any signs with English making clear I was at the right place. Nothing fancy, mind you: Is this the Meiji Shrine? Yes. Thank you.
But I realized that I was managing the exchange in not-too-bad low-level Japanese. The guard definitely seemed impressed. That's a tribute to my 20-years-ago Japanese teachers at the University of Minnesota, I suppose. Still, I immediately felt very frustrated and almost angry: the "trying-to-learn-Korean-for-over-2-years Jared" suddenly was very jealous and resentful and pissed off at the "haven't-even-looked-at-Japanese-in-20-years Jared," because that was an exchange that would have still given me anxiety in Korean (although I think I might have managed it).
I can meditate on various reasons and excuses why I find Korean so difficult. There's the mind-bogglingly weird sound system (I mean, not in absolute terms, but to us English speakers). There's all those Chinese-origin homonyms (what happens when you borrow 4 words that are identical in pronunciation, except for tone markings, into a non-tone language?). But the reason that's probably most likely, but that's hardest for me to accept, is that apparently there's a big difference between my 20-something brain and my 40-something brain. I've commented on this before. Oh well. Maybe I should just study Japanese, since it seems to come so much more easily to me?
But… I like Korean. Do I like it because it's so hard for me? Am I a linguistic masochist? Hmmm.