ㅁ I commute by foot for each day's epiphany, brought by windspun leaves.
– a pseudo-haiku.
Caveat: Poem #696 “The daily epiphany”
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ㅁ I commute by foot for each day's epiphany, brought by windspun leaves.
– a pseudo-haiku.
Comments are closed.
I really love this poem. The juxtapositions between and among the three lines are startling, direct, and expressive–your mundane walk to work vs. a moment of epiphany; the fall of your footsteps on the ground vs. the leaves lifted off the ground by the wind, and the revelation you experience from something as ephemeral as windswept leaves. But because each day has its own epiphany, the thought of the poem undermines the very concept of epiphany in a way. In terms of form, each line seems to be held together by a different, straightforward poetic device: consonance in line one, alliteration in line two, and I’m not sure what’s going on in line three, except that there is a modicum of alliteration, and, if one allows that t can be related to d, a faint degree of consonance as well–so you’ve recapitulated the sounds or at least the techniques of the previous two lines. But what I really like is the sound of the last two words, “windspun leaves.” I’m not sure that simply cataloging the succession of faintly related sounds ([s] and [z]; [p] and [v] explains why these words fit together in such a magical way. They are their own epiphany.
There, I wrote about 10 times as many words about your poem as are in the poem itself. That means it’s either a really good poem, or I’m a really bad critic, or both.