Caveat: Commerce

So. After more than five years in Korea, I did something new today: I used an entirely Korean website to purchase something using my cellphone account. I suspect I’m a bit behind the curve on this. The reason I’m behind the curve has to do with my being one of those personalities that actually reads the fine print on online purchase agreements, combined infelicitously with the fact that there’s a hell of a lot of fine print associated with making purchases online in Korea – in Korean, of course, about which I have some degree of perfectionistic anxiety.

So to do this online commerce thing, I have to break through some barriers. First, I have to just relax and keep hitting the “확인” [hwagin = continue] and “동의” [dongui = agree] buttons obliviously. Second, I have to use Microsoft’s Internet Explorer (Korean e-commerce is still hogtied by some very old regulations that keep it stuck in an unhappy marriage with ActiveX – 15 years ago they were very forward-looking and progressive and enabled Korea to bootstrap its current internet success story, but now they are quite annoying). Third, I have to have something I really want to buy.

This last barrier was surmounted because I’ve been listening to more and more Korean music and feeling less and less comforatble with my piratical ways. For my non-Korean music, I’ve been using Amazon’s mp3 store, which now works from Korea (it didn’t used to) – my account is tied to my US credit card. But for Korean music, Amazon is ill-stocked. And I’ve been put off by the lack of finding a comfortable English-option website whereat to download music legally, for pay. They simply don’t exist, in my experience. You’ve got to break down and pretend to be a Korean. Download it using IE, using “phone cash” from your cellphone account.

So that’s what I did. And now I’m the proud owner of an mp3 track that cost me… lemme see… about 138 won, including taxes. That’s 13 cents. 대박 [daebak ~= kewl].

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What I’m listening to right now.

케이윌 [keiwil] (K.will), “이러지마 제발”[ireojima jebal] (Please don’t…).

The video, by the way, is… interesting. It all goes along swimmingly, entirely compliant to K-pop cultural norms, until the last moment, when… er… what’s going on there? Any thoughts, anyone? Is Korean pop taking a first step out of the closet? Or would that be an overdetermined reading for what is, essentially, intended to be a bromance?


CaveatDumpTruck Logo

Caveat: 기지도 못하면서 뛰려고 한다

기지도 못하면서 뛰려고한다
crawl-PRENEG-TOO cannot-do-IF run-TRY-PRES
[Someone] tries to run if [he/she] cannot crawl first.

picture“Trying to run before you can walk.” Or, maybe, this is kind of like the proverbial “Putting the cart before the horse.” This seems to happen a lot in Korea. They need to remember this proverb when running a business. Just a thought.
I slept badly last night. Good thing today is Sunday. I plan to be very lazy today – I have substantial skills in this area.
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Caveat: Love Never Ends

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I sat and watched a 4 hour movie basically straight through, this evening. I’m a little bit hesitant to recommend this movie in this venue – it was most definitely NSFW, if you catch my drift.

But it was epic, and fascinating. It was half Cervantes, half William S. Burroughs, and executed like a live-action anime cartoon. If you can stomach strong sexual content (perversions!), vast amounts of blood and gore (homage to Kill Bill), insults to religion and capitalism galore, Lacanian psychosexual philosophizing and sadomasochistic parenting … well, then… if you can stomach those things, then I heartily recommend: Love Exposure (愛のむきだし [ai no mukidashi]).

It was really about 4 or 5 different movies. I would have been interested to watch any of them, though for different reasons. It’s not a a very optimistic view of human nature, frankly, despite the “love-triumphs” ending. The significant quote that runs thematically through movie is 1 Corinthians 13:

If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.

But don’t misunderstand – it’s not at all clear that the message is “pro-Christian.” Or even pro-Love. I didn’t come away with that impression. And, as a product of 99% non-Christian Japan, that’s understandable. It’s messing with the symbolism, as a lot of Japanese pop culture does, but without any deference or loyalty or, for that matter, sincerity. But just because a movie is contrived and insincere doesn’t mean it can’t be a great work of art. It’s horribly contrived, and complicatedly switches between a kind of plausible emotional realism and a two-dimensional, adolescent, comic-book view of the world. Certainly, it is the case that Love Never Ends, if by love, you mean “lust” and by never ends you mean rape and bloody murder. For all that, the Corinthians quote is nevertheless perfect.

So much for trying to review it.

I liked the soundtrack, too.

What I’m listening to right now.

[UPDATE 2018-01-23: The old youtube video has disappeared from the internet. Probably gobbled up by the copyright police. But I like the song. So I found a “cover” of the song by another artist. That’s the current video embedded.]

ゆらゆら帝国 [Yurayurateikoku], “空洞です” [kūdōdesu = Hollow Me].
The lyrics:

ぼくの心をあなたは奪い去った
Boku no kokoro o anata wa ubai satta
俺は空洞 でかい空洞
Ore wa kūdō dekai kūdō
全て残らずあなたは奪い去った
Subete nokorazu anata wa ubai satta
俺は空洞 面白い
Ore wa kūdō omoshiroi
バカな子どもが ふざけて駆け抜ける
Bakana kodomo ga fuzakete kakenukeru
は空洞 でかい空洞
Ore wa kūdō dekai kūdō
いいよ くぐりぬけてみな 穴の中
Ī yo kugurinukete mina ana no naka
どうぞ 空洞
Dōzo kūdō

なぜか町には大事なものがない
Naze ka machi ni wa daijina mono ga nai
それはムード 甘いムード
Sore wa mūdo amai mūdo
意味を求めて無意味なものがない
Irikunda roji de anata ni deaitai
それはムード とろけそうな
Sore wa mūdo toroke-sō na
入り組んだ路地であなたに出会いたい
Irikunda roji de anata ni deaitai
それはムード 甘いムード
Sore wa mūdo amai mūdo
誰か 味見をしてみな 踊りたい
Dare ka ajimi o shite mina odoritai
さあどうぞ ムード
Sā dōzo mūdo

ぼくの心をあなたは奪い去った
Boku no kokoro o anata wa ubai satta
俺は空洞 でかい空洞
Ore wa kūdō dekai kūdō
全て残らずあなたは奪い去った
Subete nokorazu anata wa ubai satta
俺は空洞 面白い
Ore wa kūdō omoshiroi
バカな子どもが ふざけて駆け抜ける
Bakana kodomo ga fuzakete kakenukeru
俺は空洞 でかい空洞
Ore wa kūdō dekai kūdō
いいよ くぐりぬけてみな 穴の中
Ī yo kugurinukete mina ana no naka
さあどうぞ 空洞
Sā dōzo kūdō
空洞
Kūdō
空洞
Kūdō
空洞
Kūdō
空洞
Kūdō

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