Caveat: The next Ionesco

I have a student who insists his English name is Skywalker.  That's only the beginning of the absurdity.  Here's an imaginary telephone conversation he wrote.  I made some small corrections on word choice and grammar, but I made no effort to try to make the thing… make sense.  Here it is:

Skywalker:  Hello.  May I speak to my fish, please?

Fishfather:  No.  If I give you my son, you will kill him.  Please don’t kill my son.

Skywalker:  OK.  Aha… then can I fish with him?

Fishfather:  As long as you don’t kill my son.  Hang on…

Fish:  Hello, this is fish.

Skywalker:  What kind of fish hurt you?

Fish:  A tiny fish that couldn’t bite me.

Skywalker:  Maybe.  Let me think.  Aha, then I will make it so you can’t breathe.

Fish:  No, please!  I don’t like that.  Just fish with me.  Not breathing is not good for health.

Skywalker:  Really?  Oh, then… I will do that to the silver shark.  He ate my expensive fish… four of them!

Fish:  No, don’t do that.

Skywalker:  Why?

Fish:  He will be angrier if you do that.

Skywalker:  I don’t care.  Doo doo doo…

Fish:  Wait!  Don’t do that, you bad boy.

Skywalker:  I heard that!

Fish:  Bye.

 

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