Caveat: Tuna Melt

I keep trying to think of "soft, bland" foods that can add variety to my unbearably unpleasant diet.

2013-12-02 12.46.26Yesterday I decided to try something: I made some squishy tuna salad (mostly tuna and mayo, but added some very finely chopped tomato and diced raisins – can you imagine?) and slathered it on soft sandwich bread, and added a slice of Korean pseudocheese and microwaved it. It seemed vaguely proteinicious but most importantly, it was the right combination of soft and coherent to make it eatable.

I'm trying to force myself to eat more "normal" foods. I bought a croissant at one of the wish-they-were-french bakeries that abound here and microwaved it slightly, making it kind of chewy and softer. It worked okay, though I had to "wash it down." That's my strategy with a lot of foods – I can chew things but then I can't swallow them effectively, so I wash it down with water or juice or soda. It works.

Last night I went around the Lake after work. I'm trying to start the jogging habit again, as I had been doing last year before my health started feeling like crap, which in retrospect was because of cancer. Just as I started my jog, the lights went out at the park – they always do at around 11 pm. I love jogging in the dark in the park – not the jogging part, but rather the in-the-dark part. I hate jogging, always have… and what is this "runner's high" people talk about, and why have I NEVER experienced it? But I do like being out in nature at night – even when it's cold.

A picture of the Ilsan skyline reflected in the Lake (which has no name – it's just 일산 호수 [Ilsan's lake]).2013-12-02 23.12.00

Caveat: “남자 없이 잘 살아”

This song title is interesting to me linguistically – the translation “I don’t need a man” isn’t really accurate, although it certainly captures the same spirit or attitude.
남자     없이           잘    살아
nam·ja  eops·i        jal   sar·a
man     not-have-ADV  well  live-INF
I live well not having a man.
I like how the -이 adverbial ending works here: literally, it ends up meaning, “man not havingly well [I] live.”
What I’m listening to right now.

Miss A [미쓰에이], “남자 없이 잘 살아” [I don’t need a man]
가사 (with bad sound-it-out-as-you-go-but-definitely-don’t-try-to-be-consistent romanization courtesy the internet):

This is for all the independent ladies
Let’s go

나는 남자 없이 잘 살아
   naneun namja obsi jal sara
그러니 자신이 없으면 내 곁에 오지를 마
   geuroni jasini obseumyon ne gyote ojireul ma
나는 함부로 날 안 팔아
   naneun hamburo naran para
왜냐면 난 I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
   wenyamyon nan I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (진짜?)
   I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jinjja?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (정말?)
   I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jongmal?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man
나는 남자 없이 잘 잘 살아
   naneun namja obsi jal jal sara
내 돈으로 방세 다 내
   ne doneuro bangse da ne
먹고 싶은 거 사 먹고 옷도 사 입고
   mokgo sipeun go sa mokgo otdo sa ipgo
충분하진 않지만 만족할 줄 알아
   chungbunhajin anchiman manjokhal jurara
그래서 난 나를 사랑해 (hey)
   geureso nan nareul saranghe (hey)
부모님의 용돈 내 돈처럼
   bumonime yongdon ne donchorom
쓰고 싶지 않아 나이가 많아
   sseugo sipji ana naiga mana
손 벌리지 않는 게 당연한 거 아냐
   son bolliji anneun ge dangyonhan go anya
그래서 난 내가 떳떳해 (hey)
   geureso nan nega ttot-ttot-he (hey)
Boy don’t say
내가 챙겨줄게 내가 아껴줄게 No No
   nega chenggyojulge nega akkyojulge No No
Boy don’t play
진지하게 올 게 아니면
   jinjihage ol ge animyon
나는 남자 없이 잘 살아
   naneun namja obsi jal sara
그러니 자신이 없으면 내 곁에 오지를 마
   geuroni jasini obseumyon ne gyote ojireul ma
나는 함부로 날 안 팔아
   naneun hamburo naran para
왜냐면 난 I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
   wenyamyon nan I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (진짜?)
   I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jinjja?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (정말?)
   I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jongmal?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man
나는 남자 없이 잘 잘 살아
   naneun namja obsi jal jal sara
잘난 체는 안돼 딴 데서는
   jallan cheneun andwe ttan desoneun
통할지 몰라도 너만큼 나도
   tonghalji mollado nomankeum nado
잘나진 않았지만 자신감은 넘쳐
jallajin anatjiman jasin-gameun nomchyo
그래서 난 나를 사랑해 (hey)
geureso nan nareul saranghe (hey)
내 힘으로 살게 딴 애처럼
ne himeuro salge ttan echorom
부모님 잘 만나 남자 잘 만나
bumonim jal manna namja jal manna
편하게 사는 거 관심이 없어
pyonhage saneun go gwansimi obso
그래서 난 내가 떳떳해 (hey)
geureso nan nega ttot-ttot-he (hey)
Boy don’t say
내가 너의 미래 나를 믿고 기대 No No
nega noye mire nareul mitgo gide No No
Boy don’t play
나를 존중할 게 아니면
nareul jonjunghal ge animyon
나는 남자 없이 잘 살아
naneun namja obsi jal sara
그러니 자신이 없으면 내 곁에 오지를 마
geuroni jasini obseumyon ne gyote ojireul ma
나는 함부로 날 안 팔아
naneun hamburo naran para
왜냐면 난 I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
wenyamyon nan I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (진짜?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jinjja?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (정말?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jongmal?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man
나는 남자 없이 잘 잘 살아
naneun namja obsi jal jal sara
매일 아침 일찍 일어나서
meirachim iljjik ironaso
하루 종일 바빠서
haru jongil bappaso
밥 한 끼 제대로 못 먹어
bap han kki jedero mot mogo
하지만 내가 좋아서 한 일이야 돈이야 작지만 다 내 땀이야
hajiman nega joaso han iriya doniya jakjiman da ne ttamiya
남자 친구가 사 준 반지 아니야
namja chingguga sa jun banji aniya
내 차 내 옷 내가 벌어서 산 거야
ne cha ne ot nega boroso san goya
적금 넣고 부모님 용돈 드리고 나서 산 거야
jokgeum noko bumonim yongdon deurigo naso san goya
남자 믿고 놀다 남자 떠나면 어떡할 거야
namja mitgo nolda namja ttonamyon ottokhal goya
이런 내가 부러워?
iron nega burowo?
부러우면 진 거야
buroumyon jin goya
나는 남자 없이 잘 살아
naneun namja obsi jal sara
그러니 자신이 없으면 내 곁에 오지를 마
geuroni jasini obseumyon ne gyote ojireul ma
나는 함부로 날 안 팔아
naneun hamburo naran para
왜냐면 난 I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
wenyamyon nan I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (What?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (진짜?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jinjja?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (정말?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man (jongmal?)
I don’t need a man I don’t need a man
나는 남자 없이 잘 잘 살아
naneun namja obsi jal jal sara
[daily log: walking, 7.5 km; running, 3 km]

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