Caveat: Antisocial In The Age of Social Apps

There are some – ahem, philosophical? political? – reasons why I don’t do the facebook much, these days. There’s a great write-up on The Atlantic, by Alexis Madrigal, who is a pretty lucid commentator on technology and internet-related issues. His article is worth reading in its entirety, but consider this quote he gives from someone named Mike Monteiro (context… facebook has been comparing itself in its advertising to a utility object – like a chair):

A well-designed chair not only feels good to sit in, it also entices your ass towards it. So this is nothing new to Facebook. Where it gets interesting to me is when you start asking to what end you are designing. The big why. In the chair example, the relationship is clear. If I can design a chair that entices your ass, then you will buy it. I’ve traded money for ass happiness (and back happiness, but that’s less sexy). But it’s clear who the vendor and who the customer is in that case.

Where I have issues with Facebook is that they’re dishonest about who the customer is. They’ve built an enticing chair, and  they let me sit in it for free, but they’re selling my farts to the highest bidder.

This is important. The facebook has, indeed, been a phenomenal utility for me personally. It has allowed me to get in touch with people I haven’t seen in 20 and 30 years, and stay in touch with people I wouldn’t otherwise stay in touch with. But the sort of market-driven dishonesty alluded to in the quote above has always been something I’ve been aware of, above and beyond knowing the extent to which the facebook tracks everything we do online – even on sites unrelated to facebook. If you’re logged on to facebook, they know what you’re doing. Period. And my discomfort with it is higher when I go into these antisocial phases.

You see, I’ve been in a deeply antisocial phase, lately. Enough so, that I need to put out an apology to my friends, aquaintances and relatives who take the time to reach out to me. I’ve got issues – I always have. People who know me, know this. I go into a sort of jibbering withdrawal, sometimes.

My job is my sanity. My job is profoundly social. I spend 5 or 7 hours every day (minus Sundays) interacting continuously with children and adolescents. Mostly, that goes pretty well – on the whole, it goes much better than my interactions with fellow adults. I really don’t get along well with adults, sometimes. This is dysfunctional, probably. But it keeps me sane.

One consequence of this, however, is that when I get into one of my antisocial phases (like recently), I am utterly burned out on interacting with people beyond that daily 5 to 7 hour window. That’s why I only log on to facebook once a week, and why I turn off my cell phone when I get home.

Please, friends, don’t take this personally. I just… need my space, sometimes.

I drew this doodle earlier today.

picture

CaveatDumpTruck Logo

Back to Top