Caveat: Isolating

Last night I did something I don't normally do – I rejected a direct invitation to socialize with my coworkers. Since coming to Korea, I've always been pretty dedicated to participating in the 회식 [hoesik] custom of "work-related social gatherings." In principle, I think they're a good thing.

Perhaps, in reading between the lines, it's obvious to people that I'm less than satisfied with how things have been at work. I've had some singularly frustrating interactions with the hagwon management over issues related to teaching load, curriculum control and changes, etc., and I have been developing a sense that my karma may not indefinitely include Karma. So I just felt that a social outing at this juncture would be more of a complainfest than any kind of enjoyable interaction.

A coworker said that that was the point – he told me I had to let my frustration out of my system. But in my conception, the Korean custom of going out with coworkers, getting plastered with soju and then saying all kinds of inappropriate things that one later regrets… well, that never seemed like a good way to relax.

The same person told me to be careful: "You're isolating," he said. He was meaning that I was rejecting human contact. "I'm only isolating from my coworkers," I defended myself. I still spend more than 30 hours each week interacting, intensively, with children – who, by the way, are much more enjoyable company than my drunk coworkers. So… how, exactly, am I "isolating," in the psychological sense?

I'm merely being selective in the scope of who I chose to not isolate with.

Back to Top